It’s perfectly normal to develop a sexual routine with a partner, especially if you’re in a long-term relationship. After all, the more often you have sex with someone, the better acquainted you become with their body, their turn-ons, their erogenous zones, their fantasies, and more. But while that level of sexual comfort with a partner can be advantageous in plenty of ways — like knowing exactly how to get each other to orgasm — having a "predictable" (or worse, "boring") sex life can also be a source of frustration for many.
Although refreshing your sex life might sound like a daunting task, rest assured that it doesn’t have to be. In fact, finding new and exciting ways to enjoy sex can actually be a fun way to connect with a partner, build intimacy, and experience pleasure. Besides, making an active effort to diversify your sexual routine doesn’t necessarily mean you’re dissatisfied with your current sex life; it simply means that you are open-minded and willing to grow even closer to a partner by sharing new sexual experiences.
If things are starting to feel a little blah in the bedroom, all it takes is a little creativity to heat things back up — and playing a few fun, easy sex games with your partner is the perfect low-pressure way to do so. Whether it’s naughty truth or dare or naked Twister, trying out some flirty and frisky sex games is a lighthearted way to switch things up in the bedroom without feeling like you’re doing a complete overhaul of your sex life.
Here are three easy sex games you can play with your partner that are pretty much guaranteed to make everyone feel like a winner.
Play Yes, No, Maybe
You and your partner (or partners) should each make a separate list of tantalizing sexual activities — from anal sex to role play to BDSM. Then you swap lists, and check off "yes," "no," or "maybe" as to whether you'd be willing to try each spicy item your partner wrote down. We've even got a starter list for you here.
If you and your partner are in the habit of breezing through foreplay in order to get to the “main event,” you might be surprised by how much slowing down and focusing on foreplay can transform your sex life. By elongating your foreplay sessions and savoring every touch, you can build all kinds of sexy tension before moving on to intercourse — or maybe you’ll get so caught up that you skip intercourse entirely (after all, penetration is not a prerequisite for great sex).
“Start a timer and agree for there not to be penetration until the timer runs out,” says Danyell Fima, co-founder of adult pleasure company Velvet Co. “The anticipation makes it all worth it. This is best if you use a random timer, and set it between 10-20 minutes. To go even further, don’t touch each other, just tease each other with a feather.”
Always Somewhere New
You might have the most comfortable bed on Earth, but that doesn’t mean it’s the only worthwhile place to get your freak on. Whether you live in a tiny studio apartment or a multi-suite mansion, there are plenty of opportunities to get creative with where you have sex: a bathtub, a kitchen counter, atop a washer… the list goes on. Sometimes a change of scenery is all it takes to make the whole experience feel brand new — even if you’re not technically changing the way you have sex all that much.
“Make every time you have sex [in] a different place and position,” says Fima. “Alternate which partner has to come up with the location between every time. Pretty soon, you’ll have touched every piece of furniture in your apartment in a new and exciting way.”
When you’re in the mood for a little extra stimulation in your sex life, using sex toys with your partner is an easy way to raise the stakes and experience even more feel-good sensations during sex. If you own a toy or two that can be controlled remotely, try making a sexy game out of allowing your partner to take total control of your pleasure (of course, set up boundaries and safe words ahead of time).
“Have sex toys? Hand the controls to your partner,” says Fima. “It’s best when each person has a toy they can use... Have multiple sex toys? Pick which ones you’ll use blindfolded to keep things interesting.”
"Choose Your Pleasure" Game
Even if you know nothing about blackjack, you'll have fun with this game, — and it'll probably lead to some lighthearted-meets-sexy vibes between you and your partner. To play, you and your partner or partners will choose from 52 activity cards, and see what you draw. Each card will instruct you to act out different sexual activities such as stripping moves or foreplay. You also may pull from eight "wild cards." We recommend going through the deck ahead of time to make sure you're comfortable doing all of the suggestions — if not, you can simply pull certain cards out of the deck, to make sure everything is consensual and no one feels uncomfortable.
You can buy this game for about $10, but the pleasure you reap from it for the night should feel priceless.