How To Simplify Having Sex Against A Wall

Photographed by Lula Hyers.
Sex against the wall frequently appears in steamy movie sex scenes and in many people’s fantasies. However, executing it in reality can be a bit tricky (think balancing and height differences). But with some planning, preparation, and a little practice, this sex position becomes much easier.
“It's about being ready for the moment,” says Daniel Saynt, sex educator and Chief Conspirator at the New Society for Wellness. This means being aware of your surroundings. Namely, what kind of wall are you working with? “Brick and concrete walls are the most sturdy, but may hurt after a few minutes of play,” Saynt explains. “Drywall is great, but if it's not thick enough, one thrust might push you through it.” The ideal wall is both sturdy and smooth.
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If you’re interested in having sex against the wall, Saynt suggests beginning “with a little against-the-wall play. Push your partner into the wall or have them do it to you. Use your force or accept their force to be pinned against it.” You can make out against the wall, and some like to add choking or other BDSM play here as well — if you do so, make sure you've discussed it with your partner beforehand and that you've chosen a safe word or (for choking) a nonverbal signal.
“The feeling of not being able to escape is a big reason this fantasy is a huge turn-on for some, and you can get this thrill just be having some pressure applied between you and the wall,” Saynt says. “Choking is great way to do this, but also just having a hand press against you chest; pinning you down works as well. Once one of you is pinned, use the free hand to explore. Tease and touch their body, but always have them remember that someone is stuck in place, cannot move and that one of you are fully in control. This play can then lead to against-the-wall sex with a good amount of time to get ready for the sensation of being completely pinned.”
Now, about that against-the-wall sex. Whether you’re facing each other or the wall, sex against the wall requires some strength and stamina, so Saynt suggests adding support to ensure you and your partner can keep your balance. “The ultimate way to enjoy this form of play is to attach a support above the wall you want to play on,” he says. “Hang some ropes to give you something to pull yourself up when playing. This can ensure the experience lasts longer and your partner can enter you without having to use all of their strength to support your body.” If you want, you can even invest in some sex furniture, like a sex swing. But there are simpler modifications, such as placing a stool against the wall, “to give you a spot to rest on between the action.”
One popular against-the-wall sex position has both partners facing each other, with one person pressed against the wall, wrapping one or both legs around their partner's hips. In another popular position, one person can press their partner against the wall from behind and penetrate them with a penis, sex toy, or their fingers. You can also have oral sex against the wall, with one person leaning against the wall and the other person on their knees.
These are just ideas to start out with, and if you add a counter or desk into the mix, you have even more options. Feel free to experiment to find a position that works for you and your partner — and remember, you can always move to the bed if your calves start to cramp.
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