After weeks of it seeming like Peter Weber’s Bachelor season had 50 women remaining, half of whom were Miss Iowa at some point, going into episode seven, there are only six Bachelor contestants left. One of these six women might end up with Peter. One of them might be the Bachelorette. One of them is definitely not going to take part in any future Bachelor franchise spinoffs. How the time flies.
Episode 7 begins with the group now in Lima, Peru. Peter video chats his mom, who greets him, “Hola, Pachi!” and who he greets, “Barbara ‘Inocente de Jesus Figarola Infante Rodriguez’ Weber!” It’s really adorable, but the rest of their conversation is just her giving vague advice about him following his heart.
After that, Peter shows up to the women’s hotel suite and tells them about his fear of a woman getting to the end who cannot actually see a future with him, which, again, is so vague. (Also, I feel like he should just be dealing with this on his own at this point.) Unless they’re truly there “for the wrong reasons,” sure, they can probably imagine a future with him, because after knowing each other for six weeks, most of their relationship is based on imagining what could be, rather than what actually is.
Moving on, the first one-on-one date goes to Madison Prewett, who you may recall had the very first one-on-one when she attended his parents’ vow renewal. They explore a fishing village, Peter’s scar now free from its bandages and taking in the breeze. Things are fun and light during the day portion, but at night turn more serious when Madison brings up religion. She says that her Christian faith is a huge part of her life, and that she’s looking for a husband who is on the same page. Peter tells her that he was raised Christian, but “a lot of times I do feel like my faith could be stronger.” This does not sound exactly like what Madison is looking for (she asked quite bluntly for the spiritual leader of her future family), but Peter tells her that he’s falling in love with her and gives her a rose. That’s enough for both of them, at least for now.
The next one-on-one goes to Natasha Parker, who has gotten more screen time for her jokes about the drama than for her relationship with Peter. They have a Lima tourist experience, shopping for souvenirs and tasting food. It’s a classic “we have fun, but not a romantic connection” date, which anyone could see from a mile away. So, it’s no surprise that their dinner conversation is basically Peter asking, “Are you into me?” and Natasha asking, “Are you into me?” It’s also no surprise that she doesn’t get a rose.
As Natasha drives off, it’s revealed that the background music we heard on their date was being played by a live orchestra, even though it sounds like the usual soundtrack. Was the orchestra here the whole time? Could Natasha and Peter see them during their date? I hope this is discussed at The Women Tell All. For now, I wish Natasha the best of luck in Paradise. It’s been her fate since day one.
The third one-on-one goes to Kelsey Weier. She and Peter ride four wheelers in the countryside and take in a stunning mountain view. They seem very natural laying on the ground together and talking about their futures. A few weeks ago it was unimaginable, but Kelsey really is a frontrunner.
And at their dinner, it’s striking how any two relationships on this show can be so different. Natasha and Peter seemed like they didn't know each other. Kelsey and Peter’s conversation is about her estranged father who she’s started to reconcile with, but she hasn't shared that with her mom yet. Peter doesn’t have a ton to add, but he loves the “unique” relationship he has with Kelsey and gives a sweet speech before offering her a rose.
After the three one-on-ones, the three other women, Kelley Flanagan, Hannah Ann Sluss, and Victoria Fuller obviously get a three-on-one. Going into it, Kelley says in her interview, “Hannah Ann and Victoria F are children and who wants to be on a three-on-one date with them?” It sounds like it could be an edited clip, but Kelley continues this attitude on the actual date, calling out Hannah Ann for being young and Victoria for being a “hot mess." Kelley also points out how far the contestants always have to walk to meet the Bachelor on these dates, while he just has to stand in one place. Kelley keeps it real in every aspect of life; sometimes it’s by being harsh to the other contestants, sometimes it’s about this show’s weird production choices.
Kelley’s quasi-villain edit during this is a surprising turn of events after what we’ve seen from her so far, but it could be that she’s being so vocal because she’s frustrated with the whole process and wants it over with. As she tells Peter, “Not every relationship has to sit here and be jumping through hurdles and super hard and all this stuff. It can be easy and still could be fun.” She also tells the camera that she just wants to have a good time, so Peter needs to “chop, chop." This is a very understandable take, but it doesn’t explain being so mean to the other women.
Even if those other women do both lean into Kelley's descriptions of them. Hannah Ann shares with Peter a list she wrote on notebook paper of “Things I Love About You” that is very simplistic and has some of the Is dotted with hearts. Meanwhile, Victoria’s conversation with Peter really is a mess. He tries to talk about the issues they’ve had and their doubts, and she says, “Every single time we’re together I feel like you’re always in a mood.” “I’m not in a mood,” Peter says. I can’t. This should have ended long ago.
But yet, it still doesn’t. Peter pulls Victoria away from the group to stand next to an SUV and gives her a rose. Gives. Her. A. Rose. Victoria! Has! A! Rose! They’ve known each other only a few weeks, this is not enough time to accept someone saying you're always “in a mood."(The SUV ends up being for her to drive off in because the date is over, but wow, did the producers get away with something with this one.
The next rose, which is not given out next to a car, goes to Hannah Ann, who immediately starts sobbing. Yes, the sobbing teased in last week's dramatic trailer is relieved sobbing. This explains why we were getting so much from Kelley. Well, it doesn’t explain why she was being so, uh, honest, but it does explain why the editors tried to throw us off. Peter tells Kelley he was holding onto the way they met, but it wasn't enough. “It sucks that it didn’t work out,” Kelley says. “You got things you need to figure out.” I’LL SAY. She’s a straight shooter, that Kelley.
Next week, Madison talks about being a virgin, and Peter and Victoria get into another fight. And at some point, all of this drives Peter's mother to tears. It's a just a mad, mad world.
Winner of the episode: Hannah Ann for not having any drama or setting the stage for any potential drama.
Loser of the episode: Well, Kelley didn't end on a good note, exactly, but I'm giving this award to both Peter and Victoria F.
What Chris Harrison Tells Peter During The Very Teased Finale: That Hannah Brown is still interested in him. And, furthermore, I'm willing to guess that this is what Peter's mom is crying about in her very teased finale moment. This is my final answer. (Okay, fine. It's not my final final answer.)