Hannah Brown Is The Sexual Bachelorette No One Saw Coming

Photo: Courtesy of ABC.
“Honestly, like, I have had sex. And Jesus still loves me,” Bachelorette star Hannah Brown announces in the 2019 season’s longest trailer. For fans who were used to seeing Alabama Hannah as a lovable klutz, earnest romantic hopeful, or fiery Hannah Beast following Colton Underwood’s Bachelor season, the admission is a shockingly blunt one.
Colton may have made out with eventual winner Cassie Randolph on a tropical beach for hours or took every chance he could to put the moves on Hannah Godwin, but he and Hannah B. never exactly seemed sexual. It was easy to chalk up their fairly sexless courtship to Hannah’s religious background and history as a pageant woman in the public eye. Of course Hannah is more into romance than sex, many viewers assumed.
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Then, we got to this season of The Bachelorette to learn just how wrong we were. You know what they say about assuming. Hannah is an extremely sexual woman, as season 15’s “Week 2” confirms — and things are only going to get more intense, and leg wrap-y, from here. This very sexy development is the best twist of Bachelor Nation this year.
After watching “Week 2,” it’s very, very, very obvious Hannah has the hots for immediate frontrunner Luke Parker. The intensity of their attraction nearly boils over ahead of the episode’s rose ceremony, when Luke takes Hannah into a private room for a massage. First, he unzips her dress a little for the massage and mentions he is “good with his hands.” This is already very forward for the second week of the competition. But, Hannah pushes things further when she tells Luke to get shirtless for his own massage. You can tell how excited Hannah is to get her hands on Luke’s ripped frame — which he unveiled during an earlier group date — and how surprised Luke is this is all really happening.
“He’s so hot. It’s easy to get caught up in what this is,” Hannah says in voiceover. In real time, she gets caught up in taking Luke's shirt off with her own rushed hands while mumbling about rubbing oil on his body. “Can we just skip the main course and go to the dessert? Luke P. is the dessert,” Hannah exclaims in a confessional. These are two people who seriously want to have sex and can’t because of the cameras (and the celibacy Luke decided upon after a religious experience in a collegiate shower). Still, they giggle at each other while Luke shows off his pecs… until Jed Wyatt interrupts, startled by the sheer amount of sexual chemistry bubbling over in this random side room.
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Later, Luke steals into Hannah’s interview room to toss her on his knee for yet another passionate make out. It’s an extremely sneaky maneuver that ends with the pair practically melting into each other (the season-long trailer suggests two far steamier hookups are ahead for this couple). Throughout these “Week 2” scenes, you realize Hannah’s dress has fairly sizable holes going down both sides of her body. Hannah is sexy!
And, it’s not like the former pageant queen is limiting her flirty side to her interactions with “dessert” Luke P. She spends the first group date of “Week 2,” which is built around a Mr. Right competition, shrieking with excitement over every man in a Speedo. Hannah is so overwhelmed by the power of Jed’s Dorito-like physique that Chris Harrison announces the judges will be getting a 20-second breather. The Bachelorette looks thankful.
Unsurprisingly, Hannah is already getting flack for her unapologetic sexuality. Bachelorette 2018 reject Connor Obrochta tweeted, “Hannah you’re supposed to find love and the one and only not a dude you want to just bang....” It’s a tired piece of criticism from anyone, especially someone who has flirted their way through the very horny beaches of Bachelor In Paradise and Bachelor In Paradise: Australia.
It seems unlikely Hannah will let the haters get to her. In the preview following “Week 2,” we see Hannah exploring “physical relationships” with even more men. In one scene, she rolls around in bed with Connor Saeli. In the next moment, she grabs a handful of Tyler Cameron’s shorts-clad butt. “That is what mama needs today,” Hannah says in a confessional. Can we be sure she is definitely talking about Tyler’s booty? No, but considering how things are progressing, it seems pretty likely. Then, in the sexiest shot of the trailer, one of the guys picks Hannah up, pushes her up against a wall, and she responds by wrapping her legs around him. Hannah is not playing around.
So get ready for a wild season of The Bachelorette — and for Hannah to still be right with her God when it’s all over.
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