We are so onto you, Bachelorette producers. In the weeks leading up to the newest season with Becca Kufrin, some of us were beginning to wonder whether we really want to remind ourselves of that excruciating heartbreak we saw her go through, like five minutes ago. But after 16 years of this, the pros know just how to reel us back in just as Bachelor and Bachelorette fatigue sets in: By rolling out the news of a whole slew of happy endings for former participants.
You remain firm in this belief for a couple of months while the show is off the air. Then, the little bits of info start trickling into your newsfeed. Right after the introduction of Kufrin's new suitors, she tells People that she is engaged to one of them. "Good for her," you think, "but she's been engaged on the show before. That's not convincing me yet."
But yeah, you're scrolling through the gallery and watching those funny ABC promos anyway. (BTW, am I the only one really rooting for the "former Harlem Globetrotter"?) Maybe you'll catch a couple of episodes, for old time's sake, and to see what ridiculous things those male models will say about themselves.
Then, you notice, there are breaking updates about other Bachelor franchise alums. Aw, Jared Haibon finally realized that Ashley Iaconetti was his true love all along! And, oh look, Luyendyk and Kufrin's rival, Lauren Burnham, are making the rounds to tell us their wedding will be in Maui next January. Did they just decide this yesterday? Not likely, but it's starting to get under our skin. Maybe these shows do help people find true love. Especially if Kufrin is telling Entertainment Tonight that she found it two more times in her season.
"I did develop really strong feelings for a couple of them and I did fall for two guys at the end, yes," she told ET.
Well, darn. Rachel Lindsay also announced her engagement right before her Bachelorette season debuted, and things are looking good for her and Brian still. You got us again, ABC.