6 Ways To Have Sex When It's Too Hot To Be Touched

Photographed by Lauren Perlstein.
This summer, the weather in New York City has been like entering the 7th level of hell. Sure, the thermometer may only read 89, but when humidity is 5,000%, the whole city is basically a sauna. So when my air conditioner broke a few weeks ago, I wasn't happy — and I sure as hell didn't feel like having sex. Luckily, my girlfriend felt the same way. When I jokingly asked if she wanted to come over to my 80 degree apartment and test out my new period sex blanket, she said absolutely f*cking not. And I was totally cool with that, because I was too hot to even touch myself.
But what if you're stuck without an air conditioner for a really long time? Or what if you can't afford air conditioning? Or what if you're camping, or at an outdoor music festival and there's a hottie whose clothes you really want to take off?
Don't worry. If you're in a situation where you want to have sex in the hot, hot heat, there are ways to make it happen, says Megan Fleming, PhD, a sex and relationship therapist in New York City. All of the options break down into one of two categories: You can either deal with the heat and find ways to touch as little as possible, or you can figure out a way to cool your sex down. Ahead, Fleming explains six ways to have hot weather sex.
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illustrated by Tristan Offit.
Make use of your pool or shower.

"I generally think sex and water is not as ideal as it looks in the movies," Dr. Fleming says. But, that said, if there's a lake, a pool, or a shower nearby then that's a really easy way to cool yourself down during sex. Step into the shower, crank the cold water, and get busy.
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illustrated by Tristan Offit.
Get creative with your positions.

If you're typically into missionary position, that's not going to work for hot weather sex because you're basically laying right on top of each other and that's going to generate a lot of body heat, Dr. Fleming says. So now's a great time to switch it up and try something like doggy style or reverse cowgirl. "Minimal full body contact," she says.
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illustrated by Tristan Offit.
Try out mutual masturbation.

In the spirit of minimal contact, you could just not touch each other at all. "Maybe you get an opportunity to under a shade tree or something, to talk about fantasies and what you'd like to do if you don't have the energy to actually do it."

Sharing your sexual fantasies with a partner can be super hot on it's own, but you can also pair fantasy-sharing with mutual masturbation. "And that's an opportunity to show your partner what you like and how you like it," Dr. Fleming says. As long as you're comfortable masturbating in front of each other, mutual masturbation can be a really hot way to get yourselves off without actually having to touch.
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illustrated by Tristan Offit.
Break out the ice cubes.

Temperature play is very popular, and not just when you want to cool things down (or heat them up). Putting an ice cube in your mouth before you go down on someone can totally change the sensation of oral sex. And dribbling freezing water from a melted ice cube over someone's body can be super erotic. But, in the case of hot weather sex, it can also be a fantastic way to make sex feel fun and enjoyable. So grab some ice from your freezer and give it a try. And if you're using sex toys, you can also stick them in the freezer. Just make sure that you're testing that the toy isn't too cold before sticking freezing metal or glass into your partner's body.

Also, consider adding a blindfold to your play time. "The great thing about a blindfold is that if you cut off one of your senses, you heighten the others," Dr. Fleming says. So using a blindfold could make the ice feel even colder.
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illustrated by Tristan Offit.
Open a window.

Have you ever been outdoors on a really hot day, sweating out half your body weight, and then a breeze picks up? Usually, the breeze feels so good because it hits your sweat and instantly cools you down.

So if you're working up a sweat during sex, why not do it in front of an open window to let the breeze in? "If you're into exhibitionism, the whole sense that you're maybe going to get caught, then leave the shade open, too," Dr. Fleming says.
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illustrated by Tristan Offit.
Have sex in your car.

If the problem is that your air conditioner is broken, then a change of location may be all you need, Dr. Fleming says. Chances are, you car has an air conditioner. And hey, car sex can be really fun.

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