I Don't Want To Hear About Jonah Hill's Weight Anymore

Photo: Billy Farrell/BFA/REX/Shutterstock.
Jonah Hill lost a lot of weight! The paparazzi snapped him leaving a fancy-schmancy juice bar (I'm extrapolating) in Hollywood sporting a tank top and a chiseled pair of biceps. He's #goals. He's lean. All of the sudden, he's within the realm of hot-fuckable, not that exclusive-to-men category of funny-fuckable, and the internet is beside itself.
Now, can we stop talking about it? The internet's — and by extension, the public's — infatuation with weight and appearance is well-documented. The internet's obsession with body positivity is also well-documented. (Click here! Or, here! Read up!) In my mind, the celebratory objectification of Hill is Not Okay — we are rejoicing that, because someone got smaller, they have become more attractive. This in and of itself assumes that thinner is better. Moreover, Hill's weight shouldn't matter, period.
A few delighted reactions to Hill's emergence:
"If I loved Jonah Hill before, im obsessed with him now."
"Jonah hill looks hot now omg that's an amazing transformation plus he has a B E A R D."
"Can we talk about Jonah Hill losing a lot of weight I've always thought he was cute and funny. Now he is hot and hilarious!"
"When did Jonah Hill get so hot?"
Some think he looks like Bradley Cooper, others are comparing his new look to that of McDreamy (Patrick Dempsey). I think he looks like Jonah Hill, star of Wolf of Wall Street, Superbad, and War Dogs, and that's where the conversation should end. Just because Hill is a cisgendered male doesn't mean it's okay to objectify him. I get queasy when the men around me discuss the attractiveness of women stars. (To the man who told me Kelly Clarkson was "too fat to be hot" these days, or the family member who groaned that Mariah Carey has "ruined her figure," you know where you stand.) I have the same reaction when I hear men discussed in this way, partially because I imagine my best friend, or my mom, or the love of my life Alison Brie receiving this treatment.
Objectification aside, there's the weight issue. Body positivity remains largely a woman's mission, and rightfully so — we're the ones who are most often subject to body scrutiny. Jonah Hill maybe wouldn't have had a lasting career if he were a similarly-sized woman. But denouncing the celebration of weight loss — yay! This famous person got hot! — feels like something that should cross party lines. It doesn't matter if it's Lena Dunham or Janet Jackson or Jonah Hill or Seth Rogen or Chris Pratt; noting the "attractiveness" of someone who's recently lost weight is problematic. If we are to champion the idea that being tiny and being awesome aren't mutually inclusive, shouldn't it apply to every gender?
Jonah Hill has lost weight before. He looked like a long distance runner in 21 Jump Street. He's gained weight before. Sarah Silverman took him to task for his fluctuating weight at Comedy Central's roast of James Franco. Now, he's lost weight. It's exhausting. Why are we still talking about it? If the number on the scale isn't going to control us, we shouldn't force its power on others.
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