In-Debt Grad Hilariously Tries To Sell College Diploma On eBay

Photo: Courtesy of Stephanie Ritter.
Right now, hundreds of thousands of 18-year-olds across the U.S. are kicking off their freshman year of college. Sure, there will be plenty of new friendships, parties, and memories awaiting them. But, inevitably, there will also be debt and possible, shall we say, underemployment. The latter experiences are something Stephanie Ritter is all too familiar with — and that's why she's taken to eBay to post a hilarious ad, selling her college diploma. In the ad, Ritter, who majored in theater and is currently a personal assistant in LA., says her Florida State University diploma is in mint condition: "Never been used to get a job before!" The post goes on to explain that for the small price of $50,000, you'll get not just the diploma, but a true college experience, including "a very quick drive by my former drug dealer/yoga teacher's house so as not to arouse suspicion" and "a walking tour of all the trash cans my ex silently projectile vomited in on our way to big events." Other gems include a detailed history of the classes that contributed to her diploma, such as Voice & Movement, "where I paid to nap on the ground and pretend I was meditating for three months." In case you haven't picked up on it, yes, the post is a joke. Ritter is also a comedian in L.A. "I got into sketch comedy early on in college," she told R29. "I decided to come [to L.A.] to take classes at The Groundlings, and try and write for television. I'm a personal assistant right now and I love it. My boss is amazing and insanely supportive — but ideally I'd be in a writer's room, or getting paid to send people pictures of my cat." Isn't that what we all aspire to? Click here to read the rest of the ad — we dare you not to laugh.