Shani Silver's Recent Articles - Refinery29

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Why Should Single Women “Settle Down”?

Can We Stop Using Single People For Entertainment?

Sally Settles By The Seashore

Coronavirus & Single Scaries: I Just Want A Husband Right Now

“So fuck you / And your untouchable face / Fuck you / For existing in the first place.” – Untouchable Face, Ani DiFranco, 1996 So, I’m fine. Hi

by Shani Silver

Why Single Women Feel Guilty For Not “Doing” Enough

“I’ll never ask for too much / Just all that you are / And everything that you do.” – Whitney Houston, “I Have Nothing,” 1993 I come fr

by Shani Silver

In Celebration Of Being The Third Wheel

“But I’m a creep, I’m a weirdo / What the hell am I doing here? / I don’t belong here” – Creep, Radiohead, 1992 You know

by Shani Silver

I’m Not Having Sex Until I Love You

“All the good things, and the bad things, that may be.” – Salt-N-Pepa, Let’s Talk About Sex, 1990 I don’t write about sex. First of all becau

by Shani Silver

Valentine’s Day Ideas For Cynics & Singles

“Hello, you’ve reached the winter of our discontent.” – Ethan Hawke as Troy Dyer, Reality Bites, 1994 Are we still doing Valentine’s

by Shani Silver

Paranoid Precautions I Take As A Single Woman

“I am not afraid, I can hardly wait.” – Spin The Bottle, Juliana Hatfield, 1994 I’ll start by saying that I’m a lunatic. I don’t want you u

by Shani Silver

I Deleted All My Dating Apps One Year Ago

“ I just want to tell you that I’ve had enough.” NSYNC, Bye Bye Bye, 2000 One year ago this month, I deleted all of my dating apps. No fanfare, no ch

by Shani Silver

These New Year’s Resolutions Are For Single Women Only

“Okay, you’re still as hard as nails.” – Harry Burns, When Harry Met Sally, 1989 The only way to approach New Year’s resolutions is with no s

by Shani Silver

Am I Single Because Of My Attitude?

“Now Debra, don’t be bitter, surely with your ever-growing collection of flesh mutilating silver appendages, and your brand new neo-nazi boot camp

by Shani Silver

Relationship Advice

If You’re Single, Don’t Be Sad During The Holidays

We’re not doing this anymore. Not on my watch. This year, we won’t be sad from now until January 2 just because we’re single. Because that’s, in ol

by Shani Silver

I’ve Been Single For So Long I’m Afraid I Don’t...

“Whatever, I’m driving.” – Katarina Stratford, 10 Things I Hate About You, 1999 Anyone who’s ever bought a power tool knows the special joy t

by Shani Silver

Am I Single Because Of How I Look?

“You’re on my fax.” – Pretty Woman, 1990 I don’t think about my appearance much. That’s a lie, I definitely think about it, but not as it r

by Shani Silver

Famous Single Women I Want To Be When I Grow Up

“Charlotte, we’re Jewish.” – Cher as Rachel Flax, Mermaids, 1990 The best thing about heroes is that they’re extremely personal. I don’t ha

by Shani Silver

I Know I Won’t Be Single Forever (And Neither Will You)

“If we hate the same people and you get your suit cleaned, it’s a match.” – Barbara Streisand as Fanny Brice, Funny Lady, 1975 A year is bo

by Shani Silver

Am I Single Because I’m Old?

“And I thought I’d live forever / But now I’m not so sureYou try to tell me that I’m clever / But that won’t take me anyhowOr any

by Shani Silver

Is It Possible To Be “Good” At Dating?

“I might play ball. But I will never sign that.” – Randall “Pink” Floyd, Dazed and Confused, 1993 There’s a strong possibility that I

by Shani Silver

Why Single Women Don’t Have To Be Nice About Being Single

“You burden me with your questions / You’d have me tell no lies / You’re always asking what it’s all about, / Darlin’ l

by Shani Silver

Moving Is The Hardest Thing I’ve Done While Single

“There's somethin' wrong, we can't stay still” – Move Bitch, Ludacris, 2001 I once wrote about my rather potent desire to be boyfr

by Shani Silver

How I Deal With Jealousy As A Single Woman

“'Cause all I really want is to be with you, feeling like I matter too.” Hey Jealousy, Gin Blossoms, 1992 I blame Instagram. It’s probably the w

by Shani Silver

Single & Child-Free: Who’s Going To Take Care Of Me When...

“For-Ev-Er.” – The Sandlot, 1993 I have many feelings, or intuitions, if you like to call them that or live in Los Angeles. I’m pretty sure I?

by Shani Silver

A Single Girl’s Guide To Her Friends Getting Boyfriends <...

“People try to say I act a little funny, But that's just a figure of speech to me.”-TLC, “What About Your Friends,” 1992 I wish being single w

by Shani Silver

Relationships
The Shame Of Being A Single Woman
“Sunny Day / Sweepin' the clouds away / On my way to where the air is sweet” – Sesame Street Walking home from dinner with a friend recently
by Shani Silver

Relationships
Why I'm Done Celebrating The Accomplishments Of Couples
“What is real? How do you define real?” – Morpheus, The Matrix, 1999 I’ve had the “summer of six weddings.” The “spring of seven baby sho
by Shani Silver

Wellness
If You’re Single, It’s Okay To Be Scared Of Solo Travel
“We are the weirdos, mister.” The Craft, 1996 So… fear. For me, fear has always been an order to retreat, to make for safer ground and stay there. It
by Shani Silver

Relationships
How “Ifs” And “Thens” Are Hurting Single Women
“Whatever.” – Clueless, 1995 As a kid, I wanted to be psychic. I wanted a crystal ball that, apart from being perfectly in line with my decor aes
by Shani Silver

Wellness
Why I've Basically Given Up On Dating Completely
“In this life, there are nothing but possibilities.” – Lucas, Empire Records, 1995 At some point I stopped calling them dates. That term wasn’t
by Shani Silver

Relationships
Stop Telling Single Women Not To Be Angry
“Self-preservation is a full time occupation.” -Ani DiFranco, Talk To Me Now, 1990 I think a lot about supposed tos. What single women are supposed to
by Shani Silver