Welcome to the safest, most contoured space on the Internet: A space where we can openly discuss, dissect, and indulge in the greatest show of our time, Keeping Up With The Kardashians.
Unlike other episodes of Keeping Up with the Kardashians, tonight’s episode didn’t cut from multiple plot lines between the different sisters and their families. Instead, it focused on the situation between Jordyn Woods, Khloé Kardashian, and Tristan Thompson. The drama went down in February, and while many of the sisters, Woods, and Khloé herself have spoken about the late-night make-out that ended a relationship, part one of the season finale added new context to the scandal. The biggest reveal was that after Thompson confirmed that Woods sat in his lap, and stayed over until 7 AM, he apparently told Khloé that he was so upset he was thinking of hurting himself. "He was like, ‘I can’t stop thinking about you and what a mess I’ve caused.’” she said to Scott Disick. “He’s doing this to get a reaction out of me." Khloé nor Thompson tweeted throughout the episode to add any additional context to the seemingly dramatic and worrisome conversation.
E! has been teasing this dramatic episode, and next week's part two of the finale, for the entire season. So, what went down, and what other new information did we learn? Instead of a traditional recap, let's break the most important revelations.
Kim Kardashian Found Out About The Drama While She Was Filming
Apparently, Kim finding out about the most earth-shattering gossip during an interview is the new norm. The most exciting part of the episode takes place during Kim's interview when she three-way and four-way calls her sisters to get to the bottom of the drama. Kylie Jenner, Khloé, Kendall, and Kourtney all have the same immediate reaction to everything: shock. Kendall says that Jordyn would be the last person to be involved in this kind of messiness, while Kylie says she legit just spoke to her and is appalled that she didn't even mention what went down.
This family phone call also sheds new light on the timeline of the evening, which Woods previously broke down on Red Table Talk with Jada Pinkett Smith. According to Kylie via Jordyn, their interaction was innocent, and Thompson was coming onto her. She only stayed around to make sure Thompson wouldn't misbehave. The sisters all agree that this tracks, but the real issue arises when Woods doesn't immediately fess up to having an inappropriate interaction with him.
Jordyn Woods Didn't Apologize To Khloé
Khloé seems honestly more upset over the fact that Woods didn't apologize to her than the fact that she hooked up with her boyfriend. Woods breaks an even more severe cardinal code when she calls Khloé to defend herself, instead of asking for her forgiveness. Despite all the over-the-top fights the women of this family have with each other — they know how to betray and backstab — they always, always apologize. As a surrogate little sister to Khloé this is apparently all she really wanted, and something she didn't get until it was too late.
Kris Jenner Was The Middleman
If you thought Kylie was the middleman for this, then clearly you forgot that the ultimate momager had a dog in this fight. While all the girls are group texting and FaceTiming each other, Kris is going straight to the source. Woods actually apologizes to the matriarch of the family first. If Kylie was like a sister to Woods, then Kris was, by default, like a second mom. It seems her guilt was even more intense when it came to explaining herself to Khloé's mom than Khloé herself.
The episode ends with Khloé going to a work appearance the night all the drama breaks because “work doesn’t stop because people’s lives are falling apart" which is definitely a motto instilled in her by Kris. It shows that even when your little sister's best friend shadily makes out with your boyfriend, life goes on. But that doesn't mean we aren't still getting another 60 minutes of shit-talking in part two of the finale, airing next week.
This story has been updated.