Anthony Bourdain knows what we're all thinking: Friends was truly so unrealistic. The chef and TV personality told People he passed on the show because he sort of wanted to kill them all. “I never watched Friends,” Bourdain said. “They’re not my friends — I never had friends like that." That's right — Bourdain will pass on your nostalgic Friends marathons. The show might have ushered in a new era of the sitcom, but the opinionated chef will have nothing to do with it. Despite his distaste for the show, the Parts Unknown star did have some pressing questions for Friends' cast and creators: "How long do you want to drink coffee for? It’s insane. Do these people work? I kinda wanted to kill all those friends, honestly.” As long as we're asking the hard questions, we have some of our own to add: How did those friends not develop intense acid reflux problems from those huge mugs of coffee? Why was it always daylight in those coffee-drinking scenes? How did they afford those nice apartments and Central Perk's pricey java? And when did they ever ride the subway? Check out Bourdain's Friends critique on People.com.