A Sexpert’s Guide To Toys That Make Unforgettable Gifts

Turns out, you can put a bow on an orgasm — or, at least, get pretty darn close depending on which sex toys you're stuffing in the proverbial stocking this holiday season. That’s right, sweet beans, sex toys make excellent gifts for lovers and platonic pals alike! (Also: treat yo self.) We chatted with Marla Renee Stewart — an MA-certified sexpert for adult-wellness brand Lovers, professional intimacy coach, seasoned author, and all-around sparkly oracle for our most burning sex toy questions — to get the full scoop on just how unforgettable vibrator to butt-plug presents can be.

“When you're out shopping, it's best to keep an open mind, and be thoughtful with what you get,” she continues, “Is it your lover or friend's favorite color? Is it similar to another toy that broke? Is it something that they've been craving for a while?” Stewart’s advice is empowering because it’s direct. It also doubles as a reminder to check-in with the people we care about and, when it's appropriate, ask about their more intimate needs. For those who may not know how to break the ice, Stewart suggests “saying something like, ‘My friend, Coco, got this new sex toy and she says it's amazing. What do you think about that? Is that something that you would like to try?’ That way, there's less pressure and you can frame it outside of yourself to see if your lover is interested in exploring that.” When in doubt, keep Stewart’s go-to term in mind: thoughtfulness. Why pick a certain suction vibrator, out of all the other suction vibrators at the ball? What makes it the best expression of thoughtfulness?


Consider the following your very own sexpert's shopping guide to the best sex toys worth gifting this holiday season — we've included some of our personal favorites along with toys beloved by Stewart herself. Here’s to the gifts that keep on giving (orgasms)!
At Refinery29, we’re here to help you navigate this overwhelming world of stuff. All of our market picks are independently selected and curated by the editorial team. If you buy something we link to on our site, Refinery29 may earn commission.

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Liberator Jaz Motion Wedge

Stewarts suggests "starting off with something simple like sex furniture to "warm your lover up to new ideas" with an object that feels familiar. Bonus points for the potential to relieve back pain!
Liberator Liberator Jaz Motion Wedge, $79.00 Buy
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The Essential Kit

The whole shebang. This kit from the chic toymakers at "Maude" comes with their bestselling vibrator – which is *chef's kiss* wonderfully minimalist and non-frilly in design – as well as their organic and ultra-hydrating lube, and a packet of 10 natural latex condoms.
Maude The Essential Kit, $82.00 $75.00 Buy
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PULSE III Vibrating Penis Masturbator

Next, Stewart suggests dabbling in interactive couples' toys. “The Pulse Duo is fun because you can let your lover control the toy with a remote,” she says. “Exploring the different vibrations are fun and inject some real pleasure and discovery into your relationship.” There are so many remote-controlled toys out there for clitoral stimulators to butt plugs and beyond.
Hot Octopuss PULSE III Vibrating Penis Masturbator, $149.99 Buy
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Novice Plug Butt Plug B-Vibe

If you or your partner have been wanting to try butt-stuff, this top-rated remote-controlled vibrating plug is a great investment. It's about the size of a Post-It and packs 6-remote controlled vibrations levels and 15 patterns.
B-Vibe Novice Plug Butt Plug B-Vibe, $199.00 Buy
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Liberator Fascinator Throw

In matters of backdoor play and beyond, it feels great to know that you have a plush blanket ready to absorb any and sweat, lube, and bodily fluids.
Liberator Fascinator Throw, $140.00 Buy
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Intense Dual Vibe Kit #1

This remote-controlled set comes with two 10-function vibrators that can each be paired with the remote. Enjoy the bulbous tip for G-Spot and erogenous zone play, and the tongue-shaped vibrator for more target clitoral stimulation.

Apply "R29" at checkout for 29% off one item at Adam & Eve.
Nasstoys Intense Dual Vibe Kit #1, $59.95 Buy
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Alex Neo Masturbator

"As an individual," says Stewart, 'you can explore with a masturbation sleeve like the Alex Neo or a clitoral and G-spot vibrator, such as the Womanizer Duo. These toys allow for different sensations and generally are phenomenal as opposed to your usual sexual play by yourself. "
Svakom Alex Neo Masturbator, $159.00 Buy
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Womanizer Duo Rabbit Vibrator

Truly one of the Cadillacs of vibrators. There are 12 intensity levels for both the shaft and suction component.
Womanizer Womanizer Duo Rabbit Vibrator, $208.05 Buy
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Magic Wand Plus

"For folks with a small clitoris," says Stewart, "I recommend vibrators such as the Magic Wand Plus." The larger head of this wand means stimulation will cover more ground (also: it doubles as a mean back massager).
IntiMD Magic Wand Plus, $99.00 Buy
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Womanizer Liberty

And for those who have a bigger clitoris? "I recommend the Womanizer Liberty," says Stewart. The Pleasure Air technology is great at giving head – plus, it's waterproof.
Womanizer Womanizer Liberty, $139.00 Buy
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Vedo Ayu Finger Vibrators

What's not to love about a finger vibrator? Especially as a gift, these babies are typically smaller and more price accessible. Stewart is a big fan of the VeDo Ayu Finger Vibrator set, which she says "works miracles when your mind is going fast and you're feeling overwhelmed with everyday life. Having them handy next to my meditation spot allows for convenience, stimulation, relaxation, and mindfully re-focusing on your next steps."
VeDO Vedo Ayu Finger Vibrators, $24.00 Buy
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Dolphin Finger Vibrator

We also love the three-speed "Dolphin" finger vibrator for its fin top (which flutters like a tongue). True to its namesake, it's 100% waterproof.

Apply "R29" at checkout for 29% off one item at Adam & Eve.

Adam and Eve A&E Blue Dolphin Finger Vibrator, $19.95 Buy
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Inner Goddess Silver Jiggle Balls

"If you find that you are peeing a little bit when you laugh, sneeze, or cough," says Stewart, "it means that you have to start using those vaginal muscles!" Kegel or Ben Wa ball workouts can be very helpful, and this set (which comes with a little leash attached) is perfect for newbies and seasoned ballers alike.
Fifty Shades of Grey Fifty Shades Of Grey Inner Goddess Silver Jiggle Balls, $21.99 Buy
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Normal "Feminine" Wipes

The perfect present to tack-on to a sex toy. There's so much to love about the Honey Pot Co., which is a Black-woman founded and operated wellness brand. Their "feminine" hygiene wipes are plant-based and a great nightstand staple.
The Honey Pot Company Normal "Feminine" Wipes, $9.99 Buy
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D-Pink Water

"Don't be afraid to keep a little water-based lube nearby, too," says Stewart, "I'm a huge fan of Pink Water, especially for those of us who have sensitive bodies. "
Pink D-Pink Water, 2.80 oz, $14.50 Buy
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