In the game of love, one must never be afraid to shoot one's shot. It helps if you’ve got a good friend on your team to make the perfect alley-oop, especially if she’s a world famous superstar. Ariana Grande is playing matchmaker for one of her good friends, and her game is so good that it just might put Cupid out of business.
Recently, New York rapper A$AP Rocky's (real name Rakim Mayers) sex tape was leaked on the internet, his private bits on full display for the world to see. Many who viewed the tape on Pornhub were less than enthused by what they saw, leaving poor reviews of his abilities in the site’s comment section and all over social media.
Mayers was seemingly unperturbed by the blatant infringement of his privacy as well as the negative ratings that folowed, responding with a hilariously inappropriate middle finger to his critics. “MY PENIS AND I WOKE UP 2 THE ALARMING DISTURBANCE OF A VIDEO CLIP 2DAY,” the “Fashion Killa” rapper tweeted.
“AS HIS DEFENSE ATTORNEY WE’RE PREPARED 2 DENY ANY SLOW STROKES OR LACK OF KILLIN THE PUSSY .A LONG LIST OF SATISFIED WOMEN CAN ATTEST TOO. BUT THE REAL PUNCHLINE IS SEEING PPL WHO NEVER FUCKED HIM RATE HIM”
Despite the widespread disappointment regarding Mayers’ performance, there were some who, in the words of comic legend Mo’Nique, would still like to see it. A young woman named Courtney was among them, and her good friend Grande decided to put her hyper-visibility to good use by helping Courtney shoot her shot.
“my friend courtney says it looks just fine !” the “7 rings” singer shared on Twitter, quote tweeting Mayers’ expletive-ridden defense. She also made sure to provide Courtney’s Instagram handle, you know...just in case the rapper was curious or anything. It was a timely gift from Grande, who followed up the tweet by cheekily wishing Courtney a merry Christmas.
Mayers has yet to respond to Grande's matchmaking effort, but if he does end up hitting it off with Courtney, she will be amongst several of the most famous women in Hollywood; some of the rapper's most famous exes include Kendall Jenner, Chanel Iman, Iggy Azalea, and the bad gal herself, Rihanna.
Would I try to connect my girlfriend with someone who wasn't exactly blessed in the bedroom? Probably not — the women in my life deserve only the best of the best. But hey, different strokes for different folks. (I am so sorry.)