Another day, another completely crazy rant from Meghan Markle’s dad.
In a new interview he claims (and we really, really hope) will be his last, Thomas Markle gave Mail on Sunday an inside look at how truly awful it must be to share DNA with him. Markle reveals that Prince Harry and soon-to-be-royal-wife Meghan called him following his embarrassing pre-wedding photo shoot scandal. Markle admits he lied to the prince and his daughter, saying he was just “being measured for a hoodie.” Because that’s super normal.
According to Markle’s account, Prince Harry and previously advised him not to work with press. Markle then completely ignored the advice, because what could you possibly learn about publicity from a man who has been in the public eye since he was still in the womb.
On the phone, Harry reportedly told Markle, “If you had listened to me this would never have happened." Which is true. To which Markle cooly and calmly responded, “Maybe it would be better for you guys if I was dead...then you could pretend to be sad," and hung up.
I’m going to go ahead and assume this crass attempt to guilt-trip his daughter over his own stupid mistakes did not leave a good impression on the prince who actually did grieve the sudden loss of a parent at a very young age in the public eye.
Here’s to the Duchess of Sussex, for proving you don’t need to be “daddy’s little princess” to be royalty. Hopefully she’s raising her glass, because she has really earned a drink.
As for me, my momma always told me, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, quote Chrissy Teigen.” So I’ll leave you with a few words of wisdom to chew on throughout the week: “This guy...this guy sucks.”