This was me yesterday. ...two hours after I had a seizure. ...two hours after I fell on my daughter's chest & she watched, along with her brother & grandparents, in confusion & horror as her mommy stared blankly off into the distance & started turning blue. ...two hours after we were supposed to have an adventure. An adventure to one of the most beautiful National Parks in Europe. Instead, I ended up in a euphoric white dream that the voices of my husband and daughter pulled me from and I ended up in a Croatian hospital being poked and prodded and wondering "why me?" But today, I had to ask, "why not me"? I'm human. I have an expiration date. I've always envisioned that date being sometime after my kids have graduated college, met the loves of their lives and created families of their own, but I was reminded yesterday that it could come anytime, in any country, whether I'm surrounded by strangers or people I love, or neither, or both. I've never been perfect and I never will be, but from here on out, I vow to try my best to live this life to the fullest. To embrace gratitude and the lessons I wrote about over 3 years ago with a newly acquired perspective. To stress less. To love more. To listen. Be kind. Spread joy. To be a better version of myself as a wife, mother, sister, cousin, niece, aunt, neighbor, daughter, and friend. Thank you to those back in the states, whom I hold dear. You know who you are. Thank you to those I've never met who lift me up and have my back. Thank you to those from my #bachelornation family who've shown this OG kindness & respect when I know I'm old news. Thank you to the kind tourists & Croatians who held my hand, wiped my tears, and hugged my kids. You will forever be remembered. And lastly, thank you to my family, especially @ryansutter. Without you, I don't know that I would be here today. You are my everything and I love you forevermore. If you've gotten this far, know that I don't share these words for your pity, but to inspire you to take them and be thankful for your life and blessings. Tell the people you love how you feel and live with grateful enthusiasm. I plan to.
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