The Nasty House Of Cards Flu Is Hitting American Workers Hard Today

Photo: David Giesbrecht/Courtesy of Netflix.
A mysterious illness has hit American workers this week. The sickness seems to last precisely 13 hours and requires the sufferer to remain horizontal on a bed or couch for that period of time. And, most interestingly, the illness seems to be triggered by watching the season 5 premiere of House of Cards. Yep, the House of Cards flu is going around.
People are taking to Twitter to admit to (and joke about) calling in sick to work in order to binge the entire 13-episode run of the Netflix political drama-thriller. The series — starring Kevin Spacey and Robin Wright as the smoothly sinister first couple. Mr. and Mrs. Underwood — is darker and crazier than ever in its latest installment. And fans just can't help themselves: the urge to binge is strong, and it's taking a toll on the country's productivity on what is being dubbed "National House of Cards Sick Day." One viewer tweeted, "excuse me for being sick tomorrow *cough cough* @HouseofCards." Someone else wondered, "Would anyone put two and two together if half the office called in sick tomorrow #houseofcards #Netflix #askingforafriend." Another good one: "If you're 'out sick' today, expect a text from me later to gauge your read on House of Cards." And my personal favorite works in another topical hashtag: "My #covfefe is aching so I'm calling in sick to watch @HouseofCards."
The streaming platform's notoriously cheeky Twitter account — remember that savage 13 Reasons Why shade it threw at Hulu? — has caught on to the seriousness of the pandemic, which they're dubbing the "Netflu." Netflix is provided people with a doctor's note to excuse their absence from school or work. According to the slip, symptoms of the Netflu include paranoia, the inability to sleep, and blurry vision/strained eyes. The note adds, "If you feel that you also have the contagious disease, please quarantine yourself for 13 hours." Doctor's orders.

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