Why doesn't Hal Cooper (Lochlyn Munro) want to bond with his long-lost son Chic (Hart Denton)? Probably because he's definitely not his son.
Riverdale newcomer Chic is giving Svenson (Cameron McDonald) a run for his money in the creepy department — and that's assuming the janitor really was the Black Hood. For starters, Chic thinks that a healthy way to bond with his long-lost, 16-year-old sister Betty (Lili Reinhart) is to indoctrinate her into webcam work. (Umm, maybe binging Arrested Development together instead would have done the trick?)
It's just one of the many odd things that Chic has done since entering the Cooper house. (Like, uh, he also watched Betty sleep, which was... weird.) Still, that might not totally explain Hal's reservations for wanting to get to know his long-absent son. On Wednesday's episode "The Wrestler," Hal made it perfectly clear to Chic that he did not want him in his house — and even hinted to Alice (Mädchen Amick) that she already knew why. Was it for the above reasons... or something else?
I have a theory: It's possible that Hal hates Chic because he's a reminder that his wife Alice had a baby with someone else — F.P. Jones (Skeet Ulrich).
I know what you're thinking — how very Gossip Girl of Riverdale. But hear me out: The show has been dropping clues that F.P. and Alice have a long, complicated history since pretty early in season one. For one thing, Alice was a Southside Serpent — as F.P. so helpfully reminds her time and time again. That means the two would have spent a ton of time together in their teen years.
It's also pretty clear that F.P. and Alice have a deeper relationship than either of their kids would assume: Remember that weird moment in "House of the Devil" when F.P. tells Alice to "leave" Hal, before his retirement party? There was real emotion behind that sentiment — and it didn't sound like the first time F.P. made such a request. Perhaps F.P. wanted Alice to leave Hal in high school, but she refused.
Hal is a family man — he is borderline obsessed with Polly (Tiera Skovbye), and was devastated when she decided to leave home. But instead of embracing Polly and Betty's biological sibling Chic, Hal totally shut him out emotionally. Why? Was it because Chic was a full-out weirdo, or because he's a threat to Hal's "perfect" family unit? Having the town learn that Alice had a baby with F.P. wouldn't bode too well for the Cooper reputation Hal works so hard to upkeep.
Another odd, potential clue? Betty remarks that Hal is treating Chic like he's "the devil's spawn" — and it's possible that Hal thinks F.P., the leader of the Serpents, is the devil.
So what could this mean? Well, if F.P. is Chic's dad, things could get very weird for Betty and her on-again-off-again beau Jughead (Cole Sprouse). Could this be the next secret between the couple, or is Hal truly just a jerk who doesn't want anything to do with the baby he gave up for adoption in high school? Let's hope Wednesday's episode of Riverdale helps clear things up.