Humans of New York never fails to elicit emotion. One minute you're gushing over Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds' love story; the next you're marveling at a 90-year-old Russian woman's awesome approach to life.
This post also hails from HONY photographer Brandon Stanton's ongoing trip to Russia, and it's a heavy one. Stanton met with a young woman in St. Petersburg who shared her story of an abusive relationship with a man who "expected obedience." It's truly crushing — but there's a hopeful and inspiring ending.
“We were together for nine years," the woman, who, like most of HONY's subjects, is unidentified, told Stanton. "I was completely dependent on him. He was a strong and powerful man and he expected obedience. If he called me at 4 a.m., and told me to meet him in Moscow, I was expected to go to the train station. He had a very strong energy. It was hard to argue with him.
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"In the beginning of the relationship, I obeyed because of the pressure," she continued. "But then the pressure just became a habit. It got worse as time went on. Eventually he stopped listening to me completely. I became so lonely. When you’re with someone who doesn’t care about your views, and has no desire to understand you, it’s worse than being alone. I still loved him though. I knew that he’d had a hard life. I told myself that I had to make sacrifices to build a family. But one morning I woke up and decided that I couldn’t do it anymore. If I stayed in the relationship, I would lose myself completely. I remember it was raining that morning. There was mud in the streets. And something told me: ‘Today is the day.’
"That was two years ago," she shared. "I’ve spent these last two years learning to be alone. I’m realizing the things that I like to do. I feel better, I look better, and I’ve been sharing more of myself with others. I feel like I’m finally learning who I am.”
The woman's heart-wrenching confession has hit a chord with HONY fans, many of whom have commented to salute her strength, courage, and "self-respect." Others shared their own struggles with abusive relationships.
If you are experiencing domestic violence, please call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or TTY 1-800-787-3224 for confidential support.
If you are in crisis, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or the Suicide Crisis Line at 1-800-784-2433.