Remember the first time you heard about Santa's naughty or nice list? That's the moment you knew what self-restraint really felt like. For months, you'd sweat bullets, smiling through clenched teeth whenever your little brother stole your Game Boy in hopes that all that "nice" behavior would land you a new Bop It Extreme.
We've since learned that Santa Claus and his (highly judgmental) list are works of fiction; as adults, if we're going to police our own behavior, it won't be for a jolly man in a red-velvet suit. Besides, being nice doesn't mean we can't be a little naughty — if you and your best friend's text thread is riddled with eggplant and peach emojis, then you'll know what we're talking about.