As Monday night's episode unfolded, Tia unloaded her emotions and many, many tears about her hopeless situation with Colton to anyone who would listen. She liked him and he liked her, but he wasn't sure if he should act on his feelings. Thankfully, Bibiana Julian — hands-down the wisest contestant of the season — sat Colton down and told him to get his shit together. He then promptly got said shit together and gave his rose to Tia. Now that that mess is resolved, can we finally move on to more interesting couples, or what?
While BIP was spending an inordinate amount of time force-feeding fans this boring high school drama, viewers were robbed of all the romance and hilarious behind-the-scenes moments shared by other couples. John Graham gave his rose to Jubilee Sharpe, but besides a stolen kiss and shirtless massage minutes before the rose ceremony, we didn't see just how their relationship progressed. And while Colton is great and all, Kenny Layne can truly never have enough screen time. He is charming, intelligent, and straight-up debonair. You couldn't even hate him for kissing three different women at the same cocktail hour.
Thankfully, if the preview for Tuesday's episode is any indication, we're about to delve into the drama of other interesting couples. Joe Amabile and Kendall Long are adorable and hilarious together, but a storm named Leo Dottavio might test their relationship. And Jordan Kimball and Jenna Cooper might have their second altercation when Quebec bae Benoît Beauséjour-Savard arrives.
In the words of Bibiana, "Don't complicate it." If ABC wants fans to be invested in the couples who waltz out of Paradise engaged, they need to show the evolution of their relationships. Show more of Kevin Wendt and Astrid Loch sausage kissing each other.
More footage of Kendall weirding out Joe the Grocer.
And definitely more of Kenny doing literally anything.
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