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GOP-Harmony Helps Find Your “Perfect” Conservative Valentine

Still looking for a Valentine? The Democratic National Committee might have just the match for you, if you're not that into the environment, Obamacare, or women's rights. The day before Valentine’s, the DNC released a campaign and video advertising a new “dating site” for conservatives called "gop-Harmony.” The snarky ad, which purports to match you with someone ”just as out of touch with reality as you are — or more!” manages to be a perfect send-up of not only the GOP candidates, but also of aggressively chipper ads for real dating sites. “I’m still looking for that perfect match,” a smiling woman says in the fake ad. “Someone who hates Obamacare just as much as I do!” “I have no idea how the economy works!” says a happy-looking man. “And that’s okay, because neither does anybody else on gop-Harmony.” The video directs you to the website gop-Harmony.com, where you can take a questionnaire to match with any of the six remaining Republican candidates for president. The site "uses over a dozen metrics" — including "can name everyone on Duck Dynasty" and "is a Slytherin" — to match you with your perfect conservative cutie.
But surprise! If you choose the answers that call Obamacare the “worst thing that’s ever happened to America” or poo-poo the war on women as “liberal conspiracy,” you’ll match with all six GOP contenders. How will we ever choose?

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