Jennifer Gatti, LMSW
You are likely dealing with one of two things here: Either he sees this as a second chance at the one who got away (you), or he's a serial monogamist who can’t be alone. The fact that he met someone else right away when he moved can speak to both. It may have been too painful for him to be without you, or simply, to be without anyone. But, this can’t be about him and what he’s thinking — although as women we love to try our best to figure that out every chance we get! — because we can’t really know or control it. So, what does your gut say, and (more importantly) what do you really want?
Alexis Auleta, LCSW
You’re not stupid for wanting to get back together, but you should be smart about how you approach a reunion. First, you should definitely ask yourself (and him) if he’s really ready for a new relationship or just rebounding from his last one. Rekindling an old romance should only happen because both parties want to get back together — not because one of you wants a soft place to land after a hard fall. You’re both very vulnerable right now, so while it might be tempting to run through a field of flowers holding hands, I recommend you grab the nearest couch, order some takeout, skip the wine, and get ready to get real.
Right — remember that you’ve both grown up in your time apart, so don’t rush back into full-on exclusive relationship status just yet. Instead, have fun getting to know each other again — be curious, have date nights, learn his new quirks. If you approach things this way, you’re more likely to move forward and let the past stay in the past. When you feel comfortable and confident that you’ve made the right choice, then you’ll know it’s time to move forward without fear. All of us take risks when we enter relationships, especially when it comes to love, so while there are no guarantees you won’t get your heart broken again, if you take your time rebuilding your bond and your trust, you’ll be better off no matter what the outcome. Best of luck!