I have a lot of sex toys. Clit vibrators, G-spot vibrators, wand massagers, bullet vibes, rabbit vibes, a glass dildo, and an oral sex simulator are all neatly tucked away in a drawer beside my bed. But there's one toy that's conspicuously missing from my collection: a strap-on. And it's missing because my ex stole it.
Of course, she probably doesn't see it as stealing so much as an unfortunate turn of events — for me. We had been keeping the strap-on at her place due to my awkward roommate situation (I sleep in the living room and have no door). So there it was, sitting in a box underneath her bed, when everything blew up.
You see, we weren't really in a relationship. She was my casual sex friend, something we both decided before we started sleeping together. But while we were out at a bar one night, she told me that she didn't want to be casual anymore. She wanted us to be in a real relationship. The problem was, I didn't. When she drove off in an Uber and furiously texted that she never wanted to see my face again, it was pretty clear that I wouldn't be welcome to stop by and pick up my strap-on.
So that was that — RIP strap-on, it was nice knowing you.
I still think of my dearly departed sex toy every now and then, and when I think about how my ex "accidentally" kept it, I wonder what else people have sneakily kept after a breakup. Because it can't just be something that happened to me, right? So, I asked around and found 17 other people who "accidentally" kept something of their exes', too — or had an ex keep something of theirs.