Parenting with: My husband, Ben; he is an amazing father and plays an extremely engaged role in parenting. He knows more cartoon jingles than I do. We only have a babysitter for six hours on Wednesdays ($12/hour, and she cooks and cleans, too — country living is amazing), and Miles goes to Grandma's house on Thursdays.
Sometimes I feel over-the-top accomplished; other times I feel like a complete failure. I try to find the happy medium between the two, which still makes me feel like a superhero.
I don't care what anyone says — after a baby, your body is different.
My self-image is the same, I am just trying to adjust to a somewhat different body. I don't care what anyone says, after a baby your body is different. I mean, childbirth is a serious body trauma, although an amazing one. I was an avid CrossFitter and yoga-goer before baby (I was at CrossFit the day before I went into labor). Not so much anymore. But I'm not caught up with the fact that I am not going to the gym and the fact that I don't have a super hard body right now. I am enjoying running around, swimming, and frolicking with Miles. Though, sometimes I sure wish I had a personal trainer who'd just show up at my house after Miles goes down for a nap. What postpartum symptoms are you still dealing with, or did you struggle with after having Miles?
I didn't really have any. I cried a few times when he was really little because I couldn't believe the amazing weight of my new responsibility.
When did you feel proudest to be a mom?
I feel proud every day; proud of the fact that we are all happy and healthy and engaged as a family. I love when we sit down to a meal, and there are giggles and conversations and moments of learning. I am proud of the love that exists in my life.
Your body is so necessary for your baby that it doesn't feel like your own at times. I think this is one of the hardest things to be real about.
Our sex life is different but good. It's definitely less regular. I find us looking to be more adventurous, but I'm still a little shy about it. However great I feel about my body, it's different, and I am still getting used to feeling desired. Your body is so necessary for your baby, especially if you are nursing, that it doesn't feel like your own at times. I think this is one of the hardest things to be real about. As a working family that doesn't use much child care, the second we have down time, it's time for laundry, dishes, preferably a beer, and then all of a sudden you are passed out by 8:30 if you aren't at work. We're working on this, for sure: finding time to be intimate, and making sure it doesn't feel like a chore. Sadly, you forget this should be a regular priority. What have you felt the least prepared for so far? Anything you think working moms NEED to know?
Making sure my spouse and I each have alone time and time together away from our child... It's a hustle; you get so caught up in the day-to-day and then realize that you haven't had grown-up fun for a week or more. Parents need attention, too, and need to have fun. We have a sitter come every few weeks so we can go out. We don't plan big to-dos or things like movies. We sit at our local bar and have a few beers and laugh at each other's jokes (preferably dirty ones and not the kind that revolve around our toddler), and just enjoy each other's company. We decided to have a family together, so making sure that family has a happy base is very important. Working moms need to have fun, and if you have a partner, make sure to have fun together, too. Ed. note: Names have been changed.