First of all, if you yourself are not a college student and you are looking at this list for ideas on what to get a younger friend or relative, you can probably stop reading this. Go to the ATM, and withdraw the perfect gift for most college students in the crisp denomination of your choice. Bye!
Okay, anyone else still reading this either doesn't like excellent advice, is too embarrassed to give cash to anyone, or is also a student buying this for a fellow student. What you're looking for is something worthy of a busy scholar's time. Something that fits in a tiny dorm room. Something that will be met with laughter and appreciation. Something that won't be met with the scorn of a person newly enlightened by higher education. Something that will be worthy of transport back to school and won't instead rot unused in the corner of a childhood bedroom. Something that won't be destroyed by careless roommates — or won't be a devastating loss if it is. This is a tall order, friends. But it is not impossible.