In his new documentary, Welcome To My Life, Chris Brown is taking fans on his journey from high school student to international pop star. But, he isn't bypassing possibly the most notorious event during his career: his assault of Rihanna. "I went from being on top of the world, number one songs, being kind of like America's sweetheart to being enemy number one," Brown says in the over two-minute long clip. As Us Weekly reports, Brown says this is the first time he's able to talk about the events that took place before the 2009 Grammy Awards that left his then girlfriend Rihanna bruised, swollen and beaten in photos that eventually ended up on TMZ.
Brown says that his relationship with Rihanna was like a "fairytale" between two "real-life rock stars," but that night changed everything and set him on a different path. “I felt like a fucking monster,” Brown says in the trailer. “I was thinking about suicide and everything else," he says later. "I wasn’t sleeping, I wasn’t eating. I just was getting high." A clip of Rihanna's interview with Diane Sawyer is heard saying that he did this because he needed help, while his mother, Joyce Hawkins, is featured in the trailer saying, "That was the worst day of my life and probably of his life." Hawkins later says, "I felt like I was going to lose my child.” Usher is also featured in the clip, explaining, "If you truly do love Chris Brown you've felt everything that's gone on with him." While some may agree with Usher, others may feel like this documentary is a little too late. Especially, since it seemed like Brown was able to go on with his life and career rather easily in comparison to Rihanna who has for years been dealing with the assault in the public eye. Even worse, dealing with other people's opinions of the assault. Even as recently as 2014, CBS cut Rihanna's pre-recorded performance, which was meant to air before Thursday Night Football, to cover Ray Rice's assault of then girlfriend Janay Rice. The networked cited the need for "appropriate tone and coverage." Either way, it's clear Brown wants this to be a comeback tale, a story of redemption. The trailer ends with a voice questioning whether Brown's domestic assault of Rihanna, coupled with his later troubles with the law, could be the end of his career. But, Brown gets the last word, "If you had any doubt in your mind that Chris Brown was done, finished, I wouldn't bet on it." No release date for the documentary has been announced as of yet.