This article was originally published on December 9, 2015.
Most people who are in monogamous relationships — and who have a healthy understanding of the rules and responsibilities that come with them — don’t wake up one morning and think, Today, I’m going to cheat on my partner. (At least, we hope they don't.) But even people in good relationships stray. In fact, anywhere from 25 to 60% of married adults admit to infidelity. And a theme among many of the unfaithful is that they never thought they would be that person.
“The truth is that infidelity doesn’t just happen,” says Mira Kirshenbaum, clinical director of the Chestnut Hill Institute and author of I Love You, But I Don’t Trust You. “An affair is almost always the result of a slow-building storm of unmet needs, resentments, and hurts — all of which eventually lead you into the arms of another.”
Of course, monogamy isn’t for everyone. But if it’s the route you want to go, watch for these signs to determine if you’re at risk for cheating. (And if you are, don't panic — but do check yourself and prioritize honest, open communication with your partner.)