An Exhaustive List Of 100 Things To Do In Self-Isolation

Illustration by Vero Romero
1. Sort your old clothes for donation.
2. Watch every single TikTok video from this blessed woman.
3. Take it one step further and make a TikTok video.
4. Alphabetize your books or, for the aesthetes, colour code them.
5. Organize a party with your friends on Houseparty.
6. Throw out all your tights with holes in them.
7. Vacuum under the bed
8. Call your grandmother.
10. Sort out your bedside drawer.
11. Dust your plants.
12. Learn to play the spoons with this marvellous woman
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13. Actually make that stuff you bookmarked in your cookbooks.
14. Learn to count to 10 in 10 languages.
15. Unsubscribe from every email you don’t need.
16. Love your timeline and unfollow people on Instagram who make you sad.
17. Research all your house plants and learn how to actually care for them.
18. Do Sporcle quizzes until you know the capital of every country in the world.
19. Download the classic Sonic the Hedgehog game to your phone.
20. Finally watch The Wire. Feel smug.
21. Finally watch The Sopranos. Feel smug.
22. Learn how to knit and make something for a loved one.
23. Explore the queer history of your area on Queering The Map.
24. Delete all the f*ckbois and girls in your phone.
25. Pluck all the hairs out of your toes. 
26. Take your coding skills past MySpace level and learn Java in three hours.
27. Hand-wash your sweaters.
28. Get your roommates to recommend a new band or singer, then return the favour.
29. Clean your grubby makeup brushes.
30. File your taxes.
31. Learn to French braid.
32. Make telephone friends with an older person.
34. Start a movie club with friends and remotely group watch a Netflix classic together. Or join ours! #r29movieclub
35. Send your friends a voice note with three things you miss about not seeing them.
36. Pick up a new spring beauty routine.
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37. Take in a couch concert. Everyone from Diplo to Billie Eilish and Dua Lipa are doing them. 
38. Revisit your younger years and get back into ballet.
39. Read the ultimate celebrity profile: "Frank Sinatra Has A Cold" by Gay Talese.
41. Listen to David Foster Wallace’s Infinite Jest. Tell everyone you read it.
42. Watch this old video of Celine Dion’s most beautifully bananas moments and realize she’s always been like this.
43. Donate rice to people in need while learning new words.
44. Figure out a sleep schedule, once and for all.
45. Plan a detailed itinerary of the holiday you’re going to take when this is finally all over and done with.
47. Download Snake on your phone.
48. Who do you think you are? Start digging into your ancestry.
49. Make a The L Word-style chart of your friends' romantic histories. 
50. Learn to moonwalk.
51. Send an email to your future self.
52. Take a course on literally anything online (and for free!) at the Khan Academy
53. Send emails to charities you’d like to volunteer for, ready for when this whole shitshow is over.
55. Dye or even cut your bangs at home. This is the time to make mistakes.
56. Revisit people's worst looks from their past, realize it wasn’t just you.
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57. Work up to holding a plank for one minute, then five, then stop. No need to become this guy.
58. Learn to do the splits.
59. Learn who’s who in the K-Pop world.
60. Do a jigsaw puzzle.
61. Learn to write with your other hand.
62. Enter your bread-making years. 
63. Try on every single thing in your wardrobe and see if new outfit ideas are forthcoming.
64. Download The Sims.
65. Master banana bread.
66. Rewatch Buffy The Vampire Slayer seasons 1-7.
67. Buy and fill in an address book.
69. Go through your beauty products and throw out anything you haven’t used this year.
70. Make pasta from scratch with the Pasta Grannies.
71. Create a beauty shelfie.
72. Give Kama Sutra a whirl.
73. Create your own quarantini with whatever booze you’ve got.
74. Change the lightbulbs you’ve been ignoring.
75. Master winged eyeliner.
76. Learn how to pose for pictures like a professional.
77. Learn the basics of how to draw.
78. Put on a play à la Little Women.
79. Recreate childhood photos.
80. Buy gift cards to your favourite local restaurants and bars for after they reopen.
81. Learn the difference between every type of wine.
82. Suggest life drawing with your roommates (clothes optional).
83. Master the fancy retail way to fold T-shirts.
84. Learn sign language.
86. Get up and stretch. 
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87. Master the guitar solo from Lynyrd Skynyrd’s "Free Bird" (air guitars welcome).
88. Learn how to make Timbits.
89. Start a diary. For real this time. Do it in Google docs if you find typing easier than writing. 
90. Read this excerpt about the white male privilege and the bar scene at Western University from Eternity Martis’ new memoir They Said This Would Be Fun.
91. Livestream a free at-home workout from one of our favourite Canadian fitness studios.
92. Organize your Tupperware. Repeat every week until the end of time because Tupperware will not be contained! 
93. Check in with a pal who’s living on their own. 
95. Remove your gel manicure properly. No peeling!
97. Go for a run. Away from other people.  
98. Master Google Hangouts once and for all. 
99. Check out a virtual party like Club Quarantine. Who knows, Rihanna might be there.
100. Plan your re-emergence-into-the-real-world outfit.
COVID-19 has been declared a global pandemic. Go to the Public Health Agency of Canada website for the latest information on symptoms, prevention, and other resources.

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