A Few Things Beyoncé & Jay-Z Can Afford With Their Combined Billion

Photo: Broadimage/REX/Shutterstock.
Responding to her 2014 Met Gala elevator scandal, Bey used “***Flawless” to comment, “Of course sometimes shit goes down when it’s a billion dollars on the elevator.” At the time she was referring to the collective net worth of herself, her husband Jay-Z, sister Solange, and — the only hero I acknowledge — her security guard Julius. Now, the latter part of that statement is true any time she and Jay-Z avoid the stairs.
Forbes just released its list of America’s Wealthiest Self-Made Women and it documents Beyoncé’s personal net worth at $350 million. As we know from their Richest in Hip-Hop list released earlier this month, Jay-Z is worth a whopping $810 million. Don’t bother punching all of those zeroes into your iPhone calculator. Together the couple is worth $1.16 billion.
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In her 2008 single “Diva,” Beyoncé bragged, “I done got so sick and filthy with Benjis I can’t spend it.” That was nearly a decade ago and I can’t imagine it’s gotten any easier to figure out what to do with so much money. Luckily for the Carters, I’ve proposed some ideas to get them started.
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Trump Tower

Valued at around $471 million, Trump Tower could easily become a Carter Castle. Could you imagine the look on Donald Trump’s face if he strolled into the lobby and was hit with an eviction notice? I can dream.
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A new fleet for United Airlines

United flight 3411 took place on an Embraer 170. Passenger David Dao was forcibly dragged off of the plane in order to accommodate four crew members who were needed in Lousiville, KY. In other words, there wasn’t enough room on the plane. In 2012, the cost of an Embraer 170 was about $40 million, meaning that the power couple could buy about 30 of them, a few of which could be used exclusively for transporting crew.

While we’re on the subject of planes, they would probably have enough money to buy Bow Wow the jet he led us to believe he was on, sparking the #BowWowChallenge.
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8 years worth of round trip tickets to outer space

For a measly $250,000, you can catch a ride with Virgin Galactic into outer space. Which is pretty much like getting an Uber for the Carters. Both of them could afford to take this trip everyday for about 6 years. They could really one up whatever Views Drake thinks he’s mastered.
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My student loan debt

I have an absurdly high amount of student loan debt, nearly $100,000 worth. (Yes, it keeps me up at night. Thanks for asking.) Paying it off would be a drop in the bucket for Bey and Jay. In fact, I could be a depressed student 11,600 more times if they were footing the bill, but I’d rather not.

If either of them are reading this: PLEASE HELP!
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