We Tried Every Product From Glossier — Here's What We Thought

Say what you will about Glossier, and its shiny, happy ad campaigns featuring smiley, fresh-faced young women who have never experienced the existential dread of finding your first gray hair or, presumably, any sort of social anxiety whatsoever. What makes the company truly compelling isn't just the millennial-pink packaging (anyone can do that) or the celebrity fan base (significantly harder to land, but still manageable), or even the hordes of cool girls who espouse the virtues of the Solution at such length that you wonder if they're getting a cut of the proceeds.
What sets Glossier apart is the fact that it isn't just a beauty brand — it's a lifestyle. It's a Petra Collins dreamscape, the promise of a more beautiful world, a world that's wallpapered in Baker-Miller pink and where no matter which way you turn there's a Byredo Burning Rose candle flickering out of the corner of your eye. It's joining a cool, unconditionally supportive sisterhood every time you stock up on a $12 lip balm, getting one step closer to owning the purposely disheveled air of an off-duty model with every spritz of your perfume.
And there's also the fact that some of the products are really, really good — like, buy them because they work good, not just "I saw five girls with messy bangs post this on their feeds so it must be great" good. So we tried them all, in the name of nailing down the very best of Glossier, the just-okay, and what you're better off skipping. Give in to the part of you that wants to buy into the pastel-tinged packaging and pop-up shops in stylish cafés — these Glossier products are worth adding to your Top Shelf.