"Jesus" Is On Tinder Now, & He's Having A Hell Of A Time

Swiping through Tinder can sometimes feel like an endless, unproductive feedback loop — unless you happen to come across Jesus. Or, at least, something pretty close. Twitter user @QueenIdle was lucky enough to match with "Jesus" on Tinder, who apparently is having a hell of a time on the dating app.
JuJu tweeted screencaps of his profile after super-liking him (obviously), as well as screencaps of their smooth exchange.
As you can see, Jesus even has a photo of himself turning water into wine, along with a loaf of bread and a platter of (Swedish) fish. According to the profile, he's also a carpenter, though he is "actually several thousand years old idk why it says 21 lol."
Conveniently, he also listed the pros and cons of dating him.
"Downside: I've only been nailed once.
Upside: I would die for you, so you know I'm committed."
He'd also like you to know that "my dad is a pretty big deal. He always beats me in dreidel."
"Swipe right if you need some Jesus in you," he offered.
His anthem? "Jesus Take The Wheel," by Carrie Underwood.
Not to mention, he's also got some killer pick-up lines, as JuJu found out when they matched.
After telling him that he "looks really good for 2016," he replied, "You remind me of water. Except you turned into fine."
In case you thought Jesus was a one-line wonder, JuJu's update proves that her Tinder match is a beacon of wit.
Since JuJu posted her original tweet on Saturday, it has received over 58,000 retweets and 137,000 likes at the time of writing. And it's pretty easy to see why. Refinery29 has reached out to JuJu for comment and we will update you on this blossoming romance if we get a response.
(Note: We mean no disrespect to the actual Jesus, and we're sure this Tinder user doesn't, either.)

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