Keeping Up With The Kardashians Episode 6: “The Kardashian Curse”

Photo: Peter Kramer/NBC Universal.
The struggle is real, for the Kardashian men at least. The latest episode is all about The Kardashian Curse. What is this curse, exactly? Kylie explains that there is an urban legend that when a man dates or gets involved with one of the Kardashian/Jenner ladies then the man becomes cursed. “Their life just kinda goes downhill after that,” Kylie says. Scott is on the case, and he’s calling in reinforcements. First, he gets Kylie and Tyga involved. (In hindsight, maybe Tyga maybe should have taken some notes on this supposed curse. Scott’s warning about dating a Kardashian? “They just keep getting meaner and meaner.”) They meet with Brett, a spiritual medium, at Kylie’s house. Scott and Brett don’t get off on the right foot. He tells Scott that his relationship status is unclear, which, honestly, is one of the clearer things to anyone who has seen the past 11 seasons of the show. “Tell me something I don’t know,” Scott’s replies. Scott quickly realizes this is not the sort of otherworldly intervention he was looking for when he called the psychic hotline. “I think we called the wrong number,” Scott says, frustrated at the lack of information on the curse. Tyga suggests something more of the crazy-cat-owner, crystal-ball type of psychic. Next up on Scott’s magical mystery tour is a visit to a tarot card reader with Kendall. Kendall, for her part, has never heard of a Kardashian curse. “I think Scott is going crazy,” she says, spoken like a true Jenner. Scott’s worries are realized when the devil card pops up right in the middle of his reading. Curse confirmed! The psychic sees a lot of negative energy surrounding him. “You have a tendency to have many obstacles in front of you.” Luckily for Scott, there is a solution involving an offering and rooster. She tells him he needs to get a rooster and transfer his worries to the bird then set the bird free, all while being dressed in white. Then he needs to take an herbal bath.
Kendall still isn’t convinced of the curse but is all for the cleansing ritual if it can live up to the mental picture of this whole thing in her head. Scott procures a Rhode Island Red rooster from a local farm and transports it via Mercedes back to Calabasas. “I’m sure people think it’s a little weird,” he says. “But look at this family?” By this time, Kim and Kourtney have heard all about Scott and his curse talk, and they’re just not having it. Kim doesn’t believe in “that dumb thing,” and she thinks her former not-quite-brother-in-law is reaching. Kourtney has an even better theory; she thinks Scott is deferring blame for his problems. Scott shows up at the house, rooster in tow, and the women give it to him. “It’s not real,” they say about the curse. “I’m offended,” Kim adds, even though Scott does get them to concede that the men in the family have it a little tougher. Kourtney, in typical style, shuts him down. “You blame your actions on something else, someone else. You always have an excuse for everything.” Scott backs down from the whole rooster ceremony, but not before giving the kids a chance to see the rooster in question. “To think that Kanye and I are the most normal ones in the family,” Kim says. “Tell me how you define normal,” Kourtney replies. While Scott is trying to cleanse himself of the curse, Khloé is struggling to do some housekeeping of her own. She tells Kim that she let Lamar know that the divorce is going forward. He asked her to hold off a little while longer, but Khloé is moving ahead. “We’re just wasting time,” she tells Kim. “I need this marriage to end because it’s depressing.” She wants a real relationship. Khloé’s sisters and her mom have noticed that she is stressed out with managing Lamar’s care. Kim talks about it with Kris. Kris is worried that Khloé is about to hit the wall. They agree that what Khloé needs is the standard solve for stressed out reality stars everywhere: a girls’ day! It’s decided that Kris will plan a wine-tasting trip to Napa. “I’m making plans, kiddo, so get ready!” Kris says to Khloé. Kris, Khloé, and Kourtney jet up to Napa. The trip starts out as a great success. Kourtney and Khloé amuse themselves by calling everyone to discuss vagina colors. Kris is deep into the wine cellar and is clearly tipsy by the end of the first day. The trip gets awkward when Kris announces she is going to invite Lamar to come out to dinner and then suggests places where Khloé and Lamar could go out. Khloé acknowledges her mother’s good intentions but is worried about Lamar’s sobriety. She accuses Kris of not getting it. Kris says she gets it. Khloé responds: “Then if you get it, get it.” Got it? The next day Kourtney picks up on her sister’s sour mood. What else could it mean when a Kardashian isn’t into snapping? Khloé takes a call from Lamar. The moment highlights the complicated nature of the former couple’s relationship. Khloé asks about his knee and about whether he has eaten. We then see that she’s his caretaker. He’s not a partner; he’s a patient. It's a sad moment. Khloé explains she’s going to have to talk to Kris. “I want someone to care about me a little bit, too.” After they return to Calabasas, Khloé confronts her mother. “Sometimes I feel like, as my mom, you should want something better for me.” She explains that she doesn’t look at Lamar in a romantic way. She needs support from her family through the divorce. She doesn’t want her family to cut off contact with Lamar, just understand that the relationship has changed. “I have forgiven Lamar, but I need to have boundaries.” Kris agrees to be more sensitive to Khloé’s feelings. “Sometimes I forget what you have gone through,” she says. That’s got to be tough to hear for Khloé, but Kris follows it with a promise to “be and try better.” Mother and daughter hug it out. The strangest example of someone struggling with The Kardashian Curse comes not from a romantic partner but Kim’s BFF Jonathan. He is not adjusting well to Kim Kardashian in mom mode. Jonathan wants to go out. Kim just wants to stay home. “When are you going to be back to normal?” he asks. Jonathan doesn’t even bother to hide his bitterness. “She needs to give me some attention when I’m here,” he says to Kourtney. Jonathan fills Kourtney in on a plan to get back at Kim for wanting to stay home with her two children. He is going to hire a Kim look-alike to hang out with him and get their picture taken together. Kourtney, somehow, manages to listen without even a hint of an eye roll. “I’m thinking of trading her for you. You’re the funny one now,” he says. “Was Kim ever funny?” she replies. Kourtney’s one-liner game is forever on point. The meeting between Kim and Jonathan and the professional Kim look-alike, Kamila Osman, goes as awkwardly as one would imagine. Both women are gracious, even posing for a selfie. Kim thinks Jonathan is ridiculous and the fact that he would take it to this level is bizarre, but she’s not letting it get her down. Her priorities have, rightly so, changed with the two kids. “Jonathan can try to replace me all he wants, but he can’t,” she says, before issuing him a challenge. “Go try, honey. Go try.”

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