When a partner passes away, you’re likely to miss that person on many levels — mentally, emotionally, and physically. Artist Mark Sturkenboom is hoping to address the latter with an urn that is shaped like a dildo.
Yes, you heard that correctly.
Sturkenboom’s piece, 21 Grams, is described on his website as “a memory-box that allows a widow to go back to the intimate memories of a lost beloved one.” It gets its name from Duncan MacDougall, a doctor who weighed patients at the moment of their death to approximate the weight of the human soul. His results concluded that the soul weighs — yep, you guessed it — 21 grams.
Sturkenboom’s box is not just an urn. It really does serve as a memory box, complete with a spot for an iPhone to play music you shared with the deceased, a diffuser to preserve the scent of that person's perfume, and a key (which can be worn as a necklace) that gives only you access. But, obviously, it's the dildo-shaped urn that's getting people's attention.
Sturkenboom’s inspiration for 21 Grams comes from an elderly woman he knows. He explains to Metro, “She always speaks with so much love about [her deceased husband], but the jar he was in didn’t reflect that at all.” This observation, coupled with Sturkenboom's exploration of certain themes ("widows, taboos, and sex and intimacy,” he told Metro) paved the way for the urn's creation.
It's certainly an unexpected project, to say the least. But, we all grieve in different ways. Some of us cry; others masturbate with a dildo full of human ashes. To each her own.