Katy Perry & Riff Raff: A Teenage Dream & Parental Nightmare

TMZ is reporting that Katy Perry is dating L.A.-based rapper/personality/Day Glo-cornrowed Riff Raff (née Horst Christian Simco). He, in case you're 'spicious, is the living embodiment of James Franco's Academy-snubbed performance of Alien in last year's underrated opus Spring Breakers. Perry is, obviously, a bubbly pop star, whose life is as candy coated and plush as they come. The two, if said 'spicions and dazed video confessions from Riff Raff himself are to be believed, make one fantastical couple. Think about it: He of diamond grills and she of the mighty "Roar;" a match made in some weird facsimile of heaven that is comprised of Lisa Frank imagery, malt liquor, and copious amounts of suntan lotion (California girls, man).
The two have both shared the only testament to their date via Instagram. She, in denim and velvet, and he, in a flat bill and stunner shades, went out for a night filled with, as Riff Raff puts it, the Holy Trinity: sushi, bowling, and drinks. It's reported that they had a b-l-a-s-t.
Though, Perry's only acknowledgement of their first and only rendezvous exists in the form of a regrammed Instagram, Riff Raff is open to more. Now, in most cases, one date does not warrant the "what are we?" question — heck, one night of the Holy Trinity does not necessarily mean it was a date. Perhaps it was a meeting of the minds to discuss their future musical journey together (he did tell TMZ the two have collaborated). Or, perhaps the two bumped into one another whilst enjoying a casual evening out.
Whether there were fireworks or not, Riff Raff certainly landed the lady of his dreams. Katy Perry rocks Dolce & Gabbana, and Riff Raff has made an entire song dedicated to girls who, as he puts it, "f*ck with Do-say and Guh-bahn" (that's Riff Raff for Dolce & Gabbana). (TMZ)
Photo: via @katyperry.

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