Last night, seemingly because she was bored and her husband was stealing her Twitter thunder, Kim Kardashian joked that Kanye West was going to break up with her.
West wrote on Twitter, "Sometimes you have to get rid of everything." In response, Kardashian joked, "Wait...EVERYTHING?!?!?!"
Does this mean he's getting rid of his own wife, too? Holy bananas, Kanye! Chrissy Teigen even got involved, jokingly offering up an air mattress for Kardashian to sleep on.
Kardashian's tweet garnered a lot of attention, mainly because it looked like a Kim Kardashian breakup tweet. Did West and Kardashian just break up on Twitter? And right alongside this Tristan Thompson kerfuffle? The horror!
But, no. Kardashian is just committed to her bit. Kardashian is funny. She's a comic! She once tweeted precisely that sentence, reminding us all that she's actually truly, very funny.
"Kim's just a funny person in general," West told Harper's Bazaar during their epic dual interview in 2016.
"I don't get credit for being funny," Kardashian interjected. "It's, like, not a thing."
Kardashian always seems slightly dejected that people don't find her funny. She regularly insists that she can compete with Khloé Kardashian, who is known for being funny, or her husband.
There's something plaintive in Kardashian's insistence that she's funny. She wants so badly to be more than the tiny box we've assigned to her. She's a social media influencer, which is at once nothing — "What does she even do, anyway?" — and everything — she's a comic! Teigen is allowed to be a supermodel and "funny girl," but, for some reason, Kardashian can't enter that rarefied space.
Kardashian contains multitudes. She is a fashion icon. She is a sister. She is a mother. She is an erstwhile personal assistant. She's also committed to the bit, no matter what it is. This past Valentine's Day, she sent Valentines to her "haters," sharing the list of enemies on social media. She's committed! To the bit!
As for her marriage, they're doing fine. She later tweeted, "For anyone who has absolutely no humour in their soul please know my tweets are a joke and I will die laughing if I see blogs and media really think I am being serious. So don’t even try it."
And that, friends, is what you call "handling a heckler"!