British Chocolates Get The Boot From The U.S.

Some news calls for a box of tissues and a stash of chocolate to help you deal. Oh, wait.  Thanks to a new settlement between Hershey's and Let's Buy British Imports (L.B.B.), Cadbury's chocolates made overseas will no longer be imported to American shores. The deal also applies to beloved British sweets like Maltesers, Yorkie chocolate bars, Toffee Crisps, and British-made KitKats. Woe.

While the ban strikes out against British chocolate that specifically violates certain existing trademarks
—
Yorkie's name, for instance, is too similar to the York peppermint patty
— Cadbury's chocolate won't disappear entirely. The catch is that it will be made by Hershey's, using altered recipes. 

“It is important for Hershey to protect its trademark rights and to prevent consumers from being confused or misled when they see a product name or product package that is confusingly similar to a Hershey name or trade dress,” Hershey's representative Jeff Beckman told the New York Times.

British expats and shop owners aren't just being picky when they complain that the original British recipes taste better. Indeed, a British Cadbury's Dairy Milk bar has a higher fat content thanks to its main ingredient of milk, which lends it a creamy taste. The American version's main ingredient is sugar, with the addition of 
PGPR and soy lecithin to extend the candy's shelf life. 

Yes, it's all very upsetting. British shop owners have threatened to involve the Queen. May we can follow suit and get President Obama on the case?