Photo: Courtesy of Scholastic Press.
J.K. Rowling caused a stir and caused many former MuggleNet-ers to come out of hiding when she recently made some very controversial statements about Hermione's relationship with Ron. We will not get into it here. In short, our feelings are too passionate, and we just can't get involved in such a heady discussion at the moment.
Instead, though, we would like to offer up the following for discussion: A list of other non-canon, or else only vaguely implied, couples who deserve our attention more than the already well-detailed love lives of the Golden Trio. The truth is, what happened between the three star characters can be debated to no end, but ultimately, it is written in stone (despite what Ms. Rowling says after the fact). What is done can never be undone. So, why not focus our attention elsewhere?
Here is a list of all the other couples we want to see happen — and, undoubtedly, could see according to rule 34 and the endless stream of fan fiction available on the Internet. Please read, and respond, and then we shall all gather for a convention on the matter to be led by that kid who tried to get onto platform 9 3/4 at Penn Station.
James/Sirius: Not that we want to mess with the immortal love between Lily and James. And, not that we are pushing romance onto every friendship. But...just admit, you kind of love it. Sirius definitely had very strong feelings for James (whether they were platonic or not remains a matter of speculation), and it's entirely possible that they had a little fun while still at Hogwarts, before Lily came around.
Gilderoy Lockhart/Rita Skeeter: She loves a good scoop. He loves talking about himself. Get these two in a room with a Quick Quotes Quill, and baby, that's love.
Neville/Luna: This happened in the movie, but true fans know that Neville ended up with Hannah Abbott in the book universe. Which is fine. But, given all his turmoil, wouldn't he (like many of the other characters) be better understood by someone who had been there all along? Also, Neville was striving for acceptance his entire life in the shadow of his parents — and even Harry himself. Luna, as someone who would never even think of judging anyone's worth by such shallow standards, would be the perfect person to help him embrace life.
Voldemort/Bellatrix: Considering the number of times her bosom is described as heaving in The Dark Lord's presence, it's pretty clear that Bella has the hots for You Know Who. Certainly, he isn't presented as anything human enough to be sexual in the story, but anyone that hungry for power has gotta have some weird sex stuff going on. Also, what better way to top off a Rebirthing Party than with some Death Eater action?
Crabbe/Goyle: They could use their pillow talk to plan ways to overthrow their vicious tyrant overlord, Draco Malfoy.
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Photo: Courtesy of Scholastic Press.
Percy/Cho: Relax, we're not punishing her. All indication is that Percy turns into a good guy in the end. And maybe, after all she's been through, Cho isn't into hero types anymore?
Hedwig/Fawkes: Because birds need love too.
Eloise Midgen/Anyone: That poor girl got so much shade in the books because of her acne. We would really, really love to see her get some very deserved attention from a partner who could appreciate her personality. Here's a thought: What if she somehow ended up with a nice, grown-up version of Dudley? Aunt Petunia would have several cows.
Romilda Vane/Blaise Zabini: Bit of a deep cut, but these two are both so shallow and full of themselves, they'd be perfect for each other.
Snape/Lily: Because of how tragic Snape's life was, we always harbored a desperate wish that someone could have saved him from himself. If anyone could've done it, it would've been Lily, but you can't blame her for giving up on him after the way he behaved. Sigh.
Cormac McLaggen/Lavender Brown: She clearly is attracted to Quidditch players, and he's just dumb enough to go for her.
Umbridge/The Grim: Because only a dog whose appearance precedes death itself could deserve her.
Trelawney/McGonagall: We are just envisioning a sitcom in which they live together in a cottage, and Minerva spends most of her time eye-rolling at Sybil, even though you know she totally loves her antics. And, the combination of Trelawney's cloaks with McGonagall's tartan collection would be interesting, to say the least.