Whoever said "there's no business like show business" obviously wasn't keeping an eye on the candid brilliance of the fashion world. Gargantuan personalities, extravagant parties, and nonstop ego-clashing provide an endless flow of entertainment to break up all those predictable trend reports. But in 2009, as if the entire industry forgot to take their Xanax for 12 months, fashion coverage became almost better interoffice distraction than the Darwin awards...or all those dirty jokes from grampy. Of the copious bizarre occurrences we had to peruse from, here are the top ten craziest.
Honorable Mention: The September Issue release; Anna Wintour's Anna'ness.
Catapulting from behind the scenes into the utmost of spotlights this year, largely due to the release of The September Issue, Anna Wintour seems to enjoy leaving quiet little insults in her wake. She casually referred to Minnesota's population as "little houses" during her
60 Minutes interview (ouch!), and then cheerfully suggested the cinematographer of her own documentary might want to "go to the gym" when his tummy showed up in a photo. Damn! And you thought those Tributes hurt!
10. Gaultier's Super Model Runway Tackle.
Perhaps the most light-hearted item on our list, Jean-Paul Gaultier proved with zeal that fashion doesn't always need to be straight faces and bob-cuts. He went careening down the runway like a lunatic at his fall '09 show toward 51-year-old former French supermodel Ines de la Fressange, nearly wrestling her to the ground in a moment of... well, we can't even imagine what he was feeling. But it sure did look fun, if not totally crazy.
9. Lacroix Becomes Fashion World's Biggest Charity Case.
Lacroix's announcement of bankruptcy was definitely a downer that we were met with in late spring—one glaring tragedy in a poor economic climate for the industry. While prospects of financial backing popped up here and there, the rest of us cursed the stars for our inability to afford couture gowns.
8. Karl's Irrepressible Giabiconi Obsession (And Bi-Products Thereof).
Baptiste Giabiconi is not a face one could grow tired of easily, but for Karl Lagerfeld, it aint about passive enjoyment. He spent 2009 blissfully photographing his boy-toy in lady frocks, high heels, and nothing at all! For those who shared his appreciation for Baptiste's physique, Karl dreamed up a peel-away cover for Wallpaper* magazine, which revealed the model's most valuable assets.
7. Industry Screeches to a Halt Over Model Crying On the Runway.
Jil Sander fall '09 was a beautiful collection, but stop the show! Something more important than clothes was happening on that runway! Pixie-faced Auguste Abeliunaite had tears running down her face, and no one could squawk out enough concern. Why the waterworks? Harsh lighting, as it were. Ever hear of the boy who cried wolf, sister?
6. The Hilarious Lohan Caper.
This is just a compost pile of total craziness. It was insane enough when we heard the news that Esteban Cortazar was threatening to leave Emanuel Ungaro because, of all reasons, LiLo was supposedly being recruited. But then he actually
left, and Lindsay put her nasty little paws all over the Ungaro name. Pasties and all.
5. Demi Moore's Photoshop Hip Surgery.
Airbrushed magazine covers is nothing new—they say even Avedon's beauties were touched up here and there. But when Demi Moore appeared unrecognizable on the cover of W, missing half of her hip, the naturalists weren't the only ones up in arms. It became an Internet-wide debate within hours, Demi defending herself the best way she knew how: via Twitter. We mean, she's hot and all, but girl don't have a time machine (at least that we know of).
4. Lady Gaga in General.
We could actually do Lady Gaga's top one hundred moments of 2009, but your favorites are probably ours too—the full-head black lace covering she wore to the ACE awards, the way she confidently greeted the Queen in head-to-toe red vinyl, and perhaps most shockingly, the way she denied being an attention seeker. Lord only knows what she's got in store for 2010.
3. MET Gala Throw-down, Starring Jack McCollough and Kiefer Sutherland.
The pages of fashion blogs aren't often graced with images of bandaged It-designers, so when Kiefer Sutherland decided to headbutt Jack McCollough of Proenza Schouler after the MET Gala, everyone's jaw dropped. Whatever
actually happened that night, the after-math coverage was a fascinating departure from the norm.
2. McQueen's Lobster Claw Heels.
What? There were
clothes in McQueen's spring '10 collection? Sorry, we were too busy flipping our sh*t over the lobster claws on his models' feet. Worn by Lady Gaga in her "Bad Romance" video, they are now officially immortalized, and will probably be one of the top five images that appear when someone from the future searches "2009" on Google.
1. The... Oversized Blanket with Sleeves? It's the Snuggie!
As soon as the Snuggie hit major network television and imposed a monopoly on the sleeved-blanket market, we knew history had been made. Amused as we were, watching the TV families snuggie'd up at sporting events, the joke was on us. The Snuggie was one of 2009's most optimistic business success stories. Go figure!