A Week In A British Columbia Border Town On A $130,000 Salary

Occupation: Counsellor
Industry: Education
Age: 36
Location: British Columbia border town
Salary: $118,000 base salary, plus approximately $12,000 in private practice.
Assets: RRSP: $68,000; TFSA: $57,000; emergency fund: $10,000; short-term savings (sinking funds for Christmas presents, car maintenance and insurance, travel): $3,000.
Debt: $0
Paycheck Amount (biweekly): $2,865.17 (base salary); approximately $ 1,000/month for private practice work.
Pronouns: She/her

Monthly Expenses

Housing Costs: $1,930 (rent).
Loan Payments: $0
Renter’s Insurance: $34.59
BCAA: $10.94
Netflix: $8.95
Cell Phone: $81.54
Life Insurance: $127.58
Disability Insurance: $138.51
Internet: $99.40
Spotify: $20.04 for a couple’s membership that I share with my ex (this is working out surprisingly well — we are friends, but it feels like we’ll share this membership forever, which I’m okay with).
Donation: $50 (to a reproductive health clinic).
Savings: $500 to retirement savings; $500 to tax-free savings account; $300 to emergency fund; and $450 to sinking saving funds ($100 to travel; $100 to car maintenance; $100 to car insurance; $100 to new car fund; and $50 to Christmas presents).
Hydro: ~$80 (bimonthly; varies a little bit)

Annual Expenses

Professional Dues: $436
Costco: $130
Car Insurance: $1724

Was there an expectation for you to attend higher education? Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it?
Yes, from my parents and myself. I did an International Baccalaureate program in high school and every one of my classmates went on to university. As a kid, I wanted to be an actress or a hairstylist but my mum told me that my dad would not allow it and wanted me to go to university. (I still contemplate being a hairstylist).

Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money? Did your parent(s)/guardian(s) educate you about finances?
My dad was a chartered accountant but we didn’t talk about money. I was generally a saver and would lend money to my mum, which continued into adulthood at different points. Both of my parents struggled with managing money effectively.

What was your first job and why did you get it?
I worked as a grocery store cashier when I was 15 and enjoyed it a lot! I still remember some of the PLU codes for fruits and veggies.

Did you worry about money growing up?
Yes, constantly. I worried about what would happen if my dad lost his job and whether there would be enough money for school. This never happened, but I worried constantly.

Do you worry about money now?
Yes, I still worry a lot. I live in a high cost of living area and although I make a good income and save as much as I can, I still feel behind. I identify as queer and have a female partner, so I think about the cost of fertility treatments if I have biological children (and I am currently on a waitlist to freeze my eggs).

At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself and do you have a financial safety net?
22 (when I graduated from university). Currently, I do not think my parents would be able to provide much financial support if I found myself in a situation where this was needed — and I would not want to ask. In a worst case scenario, I would cash out savings or draw from a line of credit. This was a big motivation behind purchasing disability insurance in addition to what I have available through my work.

Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income? If yes, please explain.
Yes, I received substantial support from my parents while attending university for my bachelor’s degree (about $12,000 per year for four and a half years). This paid for half of my undergraduate degree. I paid the other half with various part-time jobs.

6:50 a.m. — I wake up to the sound of my beloved cat, L., meowing for breakfast. We (cough, me) recently started portioning out her food because the vet says she is overweight. She does not like this and has been demanding breakfast earlier each day. After feeding my queen, I lay in bed on my phone for about an hour before dragging myself out of bed. I put on my “Hold on, let me overthink this” shirt and a pair of black Zara jeans. Brush teeth quickly, wash face, deodorant and out the door.

9:30 a.m. — Arrive at a work meeting to discuss a challenging team situation from yesterday. A lot of people are still feeling it, including myself. I started a new job in December and I’ve been struggling with it. I’ve never made this much money before, but the work itself is slow and the emotional cost of the situation is getting higher.

12:30 p.m. — Leave the meeting site, which is conveniently near Costco. I go in with the immediate task of securing a hot dog ($1.56, thank you Costco for the affordable lunch). I walk around browsing and snapping up samples (most yummy is chocolate mini-eggs). I buy Japanese BBQ sauce that I’ve been looking for and a bag of Sour Patch bunnies, which will be a gift for someone, most likely my sister ($21.88). $23.44

1:30 p.m. — Arrive home for WFH afternoon. I set myself up outside on the patio and my chatty L. meows all of her feelings to the neighbours. I consider whether we need to find an animal communicator. We go inside for quiet time. 

3:30 p.m. — My dad calls for a chat. He lives in a retirement home in another province and had to go into a care facility at a younger age (63) for significant physical health and mobility concerns. Cognitively, he is sharp as a tack and wants to talk politics, sprinkled with jokes about his day-to-day life at the retirement home. L. meows to say hi while I talk to him. After the call, we are back to emails.

5 p.m. — I shower off the day, and commence a Netflix marathon viewing of Temptation Island. Hello, reminder from my childhood glory days of reality TV. I think about how different it is now — no waiting a week for the next episode — and I think about how this impedes delayed gratification.

10 p.m. — I make a late-night Girl Dinner of a fried egg, toast, and apple with peanut butter. Dessert is nacho chips and salsa. 

8:30 a.m. — Rise and shine from the couch (where I fell asleep watching Temptation Island). L. also slept in. Eat nacho chips and salsa for breakfast. Catch up on emails and messages. Work from home this morning and get distracted by cleaning the oven and microwave (for the first time since I cannot remember when). I try this cleaning product recipe (baking soda, dish soap, and hydrogen peroxide) and it is okay, but I don’t think I’ll make it again.

12:30 p.m. — Arrive at a coffee shop to meet my coworker for a meeting — except I arrive at the wrong location. Drive to the right coffee shop and arrive 15 minutes late with a huge line. No coffee, no cookie, but could this be a sign it’s a zero spend day? (Yes, is the answer.)

1:30 p.m. — We check out one of our new office spaces and it has been beautifully decorated by the staff onsite. I am blown away by the shift in energy!

3 p.m. — I arrive home and am ready for lunch. I make two fried eggs, two toasts, stir-fry veggies and fries, plus a spinach, raspberry and banana smoothie. I am a better person after eating.

3:30 p.m. — See a message from my realtor that we can go look at a listing I’m interested in tonight at 6:30 p.m. Exciting! I continue messaging my coworkers and planning things for the week.

4:30 p.m. — The work day is done and I watch Miracles From Heaven on Netflix. So many feels. My sister texts that she is struggling and needs help (she is in another province with my nearly three-year-old niece). We FaceTime and chat through my niece’s evening routine. We brush our teeth together and sing a song over the phone. I tell my niece to give my sis “squeezes” (hugs) and I think this helps her feel better.

6:30 p.m. — Walk to the listing (an apartment down the street). The cherry blossoms are in full bloom! I like the unit and it’s lovely in a lot of ways, but there is this feeling “not quite” as I walk home. I will spend my life savings another day.

7:30 p.m. — Barbecue flavour chips seems like a responsible dinner. Yum. Take a bath, catch up on texts, and book a rental car for my visit to see family later in the month.

9 p.m. — Time for a “proper” dinner: salami sandwich with mayo on sourdough bread. I start reading a new book (my goal is one book a month): Love At First Spite. Stave off urges to go get a McFlurry. Barely. 

7 a.m. — Wake up early because I have my last session of training this morning (EMDR — amazing training but emotionally activating). Brush teeth and run out the door. My coworker picks me up and I revel in being a passenger princess. We finish the training around 11 a.m. and drive to work.

12:30 p.m. — Lunch for a colleague’s birthday. We eat sushi, takoyaki, and birthday cake. Big chat with my coworkers and then my coworker drives me home.

3 p.m. — I’m finished for the day and I take a nap to celebrate Friday. Wake up around 4:30 p.m. and go to the grocery store for lemonade, a pepperoni cheese stick, ice cream, and popcorn twists. I am a beacon of health for dinner. $19.33

7 p.m. — In Canada, our oldest department store, The Bay, is closing down. A friend’s girlfriend was able to get two of their logo wool blankets at cost since she works for a supplier. There are three of us and two blankets, so a random draw is suggested. I am not chosen but my friend offers for me to take her blanket to save money. Initially I am excited but then I start reading about the colonial history of The Bay. I went to an Indigenous training recently and I feel ignorant at my lack of ability to make connections. The fact that it is a blanket makes me feel extra sick. I message my friends my concern and offer to pay for the blanket but let them know that I don’t feel comfortable keeping it. We reach an agreement that I will buy it for now with the option of my friend to pay me back when her finances settle or I will resell it. I call my girlfriend J. for support and ask her if we can get bubble tea tomorrow if my friends now hate me. She says we can get it either way. $165.27

7 a.m. — Wake up early (this happens to me a lot when I perceive conflict or feel like I’ve let people down). My friend chat is quiet and I’m convinced they hate me. I force myself to go for a walk to return my library books before heading into work at the private practice clinic. I run into one of my coworkers on my walk and she gives me a hug which is really sweet.

9:30 a.m. — I feel better temporarily after the walk. But on my drive to work, I continue overthinking, wishing I had stayed quiet about my feelings and then dealt with the blanket on my own. My last message to the chat was a bid for reassurance that hasn’t come yet and I know the person I really need reassurance from is myself. I get a gruyère sandwich from an Italian grocery store near my work ($9.40, but I have a gift card). I have several client appointments in a row so this will function as brunch for me and allow me to take my medication earlier in the day. Zoloft + therapy has been so helpful for my anxiety. $9.40 (Expensed)

1 p.m. — My friends are sweet and remind me I’m not hated. I feel better but also because I had three reasonably good sessions. My new job has been super slow and it has been dispiriting to not have enough work to do. Having private practice on the side has been a really big help. I have a break between my third and fourth sessions and look at mistint paints (I want to find one to paint wooden deck furniture). No luck at the store, but I do leave with ideas. Go back to work and lay on a beanbag chair until my last client comes.

4:30 p.m. — Get gas on my way home because it is 20 cents cheaper a litre (gas has been varying so much here). Usually I am a fill-it-up-when-it’s-almost-empty girl, which my friends justifiably tease me for, but this feels so adult. $45.46

6 p.m. — J. comes over. I make us a vegan dinner of sweet Korean lentils, okra, and rice. J. is vegan and it was easier than expected to learn how to cook for her. It’s my first-ever relationship that has felt healthy and secure. We both had hard weeks, so our evening is really simple. After dinner, we walk to get bubble tea. J. treats since I treated last weekend. She gets oat milk tea with pearls and I get a taro slush with pearls (it is phenomenal and J. seems really into mine, too). When we get home, J. traces my back with her fingers for a looong time (one of my fave things and I feel so taken care of when she does it) and then it’s her turn. This leads to sex and then we fall asleep snuggled up for a little bit. At midnight, J. goes home and I go back to bed.

6:50 a.m. — Wake up to my cat’s demands for breakfast. Feed her and struggle to go back to bed. Look up cat auto-feeders, then read erotica for about an hour and before falling back to sleep.

11:25 a.m. — Wake up for good and realize the time — wild for me, but nice. Respond to messages and buy a ticket to my friend M.’s comedy open mic show which is later in the week. Start reading Let Them by Mel Robbins (aptly timed for me). Stay inside too long but eventually get out for a short walk. $17.31

4 p.m. — Order a super belated birthday gift for my friend M. It is a notebook with raccoons that says “Trashy Thoughts”, and a multicolour click pen with dogs. We do small gifts and I think she will like these. $17.90

6:30 p.m. — Meet friends for hotpot. There are five of us and it takes a while to get a table. This restaurant serves individual hotpot bowls. I order the veggie bowl and it is just okay for me. But I am glad to see everyone and catch up. My friend B. orders a very spicy hotpot and lets me try his broth. I immediately start coughing and this seems to cheer him up. $25

8:45 p.m. — Drop by J.’s place to chat (I asked her if I could come chat about my feelings and she is very gracious to make time for me). She had a hard day and I find out that she experienced a family loss. We talk and then hold each other. I love her a lot and she is a gem. But I worry that I will overthink things in a misperceiving way or self-sabotage (this is probably down to past bad relationships experiences and a tad too much relational anxiety). 

6 a.m. — I wake up to my cat’s readiness for breakfast. Feed her and go back to sleep until 7:30 a.m. Wake up with a zest for cleaning (where did this come from?) and tackle the bathroom and the mountain of clean clothes on the floor.

10 a.m. — Meeting in person with colleagues until 1 p.m. I get McDonald’s afterwards (McDouble, small fries, small iced tea) and it is delicious ($6.22). I get Timbits for dessert ($3.19). $9.41

2 p.m. — I was supposed to meet up with my friend and her daughters, but she loses her phone and doesn’t reply back in time. I catch up on emails before seeing a private client at 4:30 p.m. I listen to a webinar on my way home from work called The Case for Taking Sides in Couples Therapy and I wonder if I am the problem in my relationship. I still feel unsettled, even though J. is amazing. I asked my best friend K. if we can do a call tomorrow and we confirm a time. 

7 p.m. — On my drive home, I stock up on snacks from the dollar store (three flavours of chips). Today feels extra unhealthy. Then I find out that a friend of mine has moved five hours away without the chance to say goodbye. Her husband was in police training so I knew this was coming, but I didn’t know exactly when. I adore her baby boy and I feel sad I couldn’t say goodbye to them. I debate saying something to her, but decide not to and find peace in that. I know she had to move super quickly after her husband’s grad and think that maybe I can visit her in the summer. Mercury was supposed to come out of retrograde today, but the residual yuck still feels there. $6.04

8 p.m. — I force myself to make dinner, which is spaghetti and meatballs. I clean my kitchen and journal. I play ball with L. and she demonstrates her athletic prowess. I think she was a soccer player in a previous life.

10 p.m. — Phone call with J. for about an hour and then a night-time walk. I check my mail (I love mail!) and realize something for another person down the street was delivered to me. I walk down to the correct building to deliver it. Give L. extra food as a deterrent to a 6 a.m. wake up call — let’s hope!

8 a.m. — Wake up and today will be a WFH day. L. wants to play ball again, so we do. My first meeting is at 9:15 a.m. for about an hour. Today is really quiet without anything else scheduled after. I have readings I can do and catching up on emails, etc., but I am struggling with the lack of work right now. I ask my colleague who lives nearby if she wants to take a walk.

11 a.m. — Meet with my colleague to check out a nearby fundraiser book sale. She brings me soup made by her husband. It’s the last day of the book sale and it’s $10 for a bag of books. We each get a bag and lunch (the yummiest egg and cheese sandwich ever; $8 including tip). On my way out, I buy three 50/50 tickets ($10). $28

1:15 — Phone call with my best friend K., who is validating and supportive. She listens to me and we do a quick catchup, but will connect later in the week for a Zoom book club (we meet with another friend and are working through a workbook called Be Kind to Yourself).

4 p.m. — Take a nap. Be lazy and spend a lot of time on the couch this evening. I definitely need to up my activity levels.

9 p.m. — Heat up the soup from my coworker’s husband — his food is magical, too — such a good food day! It’s a lentil veggie soup and I eat it with buttered sourdough toast. I am craving chocolate so I walk to the store to get mini eggs which is the perfect end to the day. $2.63

“It was really interesting to track my spending this week and made me more aware — not only of money, but also what I eat, my activity levels and mental wellbeing. I don’t feel great about the blanket but I see it as a good learning moment to become more aware of what I buy and how sneaky colonialism can be (in many different forms). I’ve decided that when I get it from my friend, I will re-sell it and donate the proceeds to a local Indigenous organization, and that feels right for me. Reviewing the week makes me feel so grateful for the people in my life, who are so special to me, and for all that I have.”