Divorce Finale Recap: Wrong Move

Photo: Courtesy of HBO.
So, as suspected, we've endured 10 episodes about an impending divorce and there's still no divorce yet. Come on, HBO! How long is this thing going to drag out?

Though at times it's been a bit frustrating waiting for stuff to actually happen, all season long, two things have remained constant: As SJP promised us, Frances is not likable, and Robert is annoying but hilarious. It's been interesting to see how the writers have manipulated our feelings between being #TeamFrances and #TeamRobert; for most of the season I was surprisingly on #TeamRobert, but by the end of this episode, I was definitely #TeamFrances.

But let's start at the beginning: We begin by learning that Robert is finally getting this whole Fun Space business going. But while in a final meeting to close the property with his team (which includes Nick, after all, and Gerald, his former divorce lawyer turned LLC expert), he learns that everyone's check for the down payment on the property cleared — except for his, because apparently, his assets have been frozen in the divorce. Robert is furious, thinking Frances is to blame, but his lawyer reminds him it may not have been Frances' doing, but instead a stealthy move by her lawyer. We can tell Robert is still suspicious, though. And angry.

Meanwhile, poor Tom and Lila are waiting around after school, confused. Tom thought it was his dad's day to pick them up before Lila reminds him they were supposed to take the bus to their mom's house — just as the bus is pulling off. The kids proceed to walk home, but as they're walking, Lila gets hit by a car pulling out of a parking spot. Finally: a major sign to these self-absorbed parents that this huge war isn't just affecting them, but also their kids. Frances admits to Robert that she was envisioning Lila in the hospital bed feeling like she wasn't important enough, and that night, Robert puts Lila to bed wearing a face bandage that matches hers, for "solidarity." Sweet.

And then we head to the opening of Frances' new art gallery. Her kids are there, as is her father — whom Frances decides to tell the truth about the divorce. She admits that it was she who had the affair, not Robert. While her father tells her this breaks his heart a little bit, he also hints yet again that maybe Frances' mother might have done something similar in their own marriage. Hm.

Then come two surprise guests. The first is Julian, whom Frances is clearly not happy to see. When Frances shows no interest (despite him attempting to woo her by confessing that he Googles her every night) he leaves the opening — just as Robert is arriving. Julian runs away.

I expect Robert to throw a tantrum, either about seeing Julian or about his frozen assets, but instead he sits down with Frances and gives her compliments about her gallery and says how nice it is that she had a vision and was able to see it through — hinting at the downfall of his own Fun Space idea. Frances clearly doesn't know anything about the assets, though, and their nice talks ends with a good-night kiss. I basically threw my hands up to the sky to ask: WHY?! Does this mean these two are getting back together?!

Later that night, they talk on the phone, and Frances asks if the kids can come skiing with her the upcoming weekend instead of staying with Robert as scheduled. Robert agrees, and all seems good — until we see him at home, angrily throwing furniture around. He's clearly still pissed. Then, in the morning, we see him call 911.

Frances, meanwhile, is driving the kids to their ski trip. Next thing you know, a police officer pulls her over, asking if she has legal authority to take the kids even though this is her husband's dedicated weekend. It becomes clear pretty quickly that this is Robert's doing. I had to pause here and ask, Hold up — did this dude really just call the cops on his wife and kids?! That was a major fuckboy move!

As the cops are putting in a call to straighten things out, Frances speaks the last words of the season on a voicemail for Robert. "I just want to let you know that your children are trying very hard not to cry because they are terrified that I'm getting arrested. Now I imagine that somehow, you didn't bother to think through this imbecilic move...but you have made a terrible, awful, irreparable mistake. And you've lost, Robert. You have lost everything now."

And that, friends, is how season 1 ends. The writers have managed to get us back on Frances' side — or at least, against Robert. So what will season 2 bring? Will we ever see an actual divorce between these two? And what's going to happen with the kids?

We'll have to wait some time to find out, but I hope you enjoyed our season 1 recaps. Until the next one!

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