Many of us can probably remember being told at some point during grade school that the pesky little boy who won't stop pulling on our pigtails or throwing sand at us on the playground is doing it because he "likes" us. Fifth-grader Zoe, however, is having none of that nonsense. In a searing list of "rules and regulations," Zoe laid down the law for a classmate named Noah who seemingly won't leave her alone. Twitter user @WhosDenverJones received a photo of the list from a friend, who is a teacher, and couldn't resist sharing Zoe's rules.
1. Do not touch my shoulder 2. Do not get behind me with all that playing + foolishness. (Don't get behind me at all) 3. Do not speak to me unless its a greeting, which will be never 4. Stop playing with me on the bus 5. I have a short temper with people and you ruin my day because you play 2 much 6. Reread 500 times 7. You like me (as a gf) but I don't like you (as a bf) I'm 2 young! And in case these rules weren't clear enough for Noah, Zoe issued a very stern warning: "If you break any of these rules I'm calling my dad, my mom's friend, my fake mom, and a janator (don't mind spelling) I know!!!!!!" "If you ruin my day I'm going to have to go to counseling!!!!" she wrote, before delivering a final message: "Stop playing with me!!!!!!" Since being posted on Thursday, the list has gotten over 6,000 retweets — and for good reason. As another Twitter user pointed out, Zoe's ability to assert herself at such a young age is truly commendable. "Zoe is my hero!" Lindsay wrote. "She's got consent and boundaries down, communicates very clearly. No excuses, Noah." Though this list was written for a child in grade school, most of us can probably think of a few grown men who would benefit from reading it. And on the flip side, Zoe can serve as an inspiration to us all: The next time a creepy dude won't leave you alone, ask yourself, "What would Zoe do?"