It happened! I'm so flippin' excited I don't even know what to do. I don't mean to take joy in what is clearly Mindy (Mindy Kaling) and Danny's (Chris Messina) pain, but I'm just so happy that they finally had it out over all the tension and unresolved issues in their relationship. It's only been what, an entire season of The Mindy Project in the making? But how does the tension come to a head? Well, it all starts with Danny and Mindy having a ton of "procreation sex." According to Mindy, it's not the same as the romantic, lovemaking type of sex, or the passionate, can't-keep-your-hands-off-each-other kind. Procreation sex seems to involve lots of staring into one another's eyes even after you've both finished, and remaining inside your girlfriend/fiancée/spouse when it's over so you can pray that the coitus in which you just engaged will result in a baby. It's exactly as awkward as it sounds. Mindy still isn't sure if she wants to have another baby, but she also won't come clean to Danny about her reticence. She decides to get passive-aggressive and sneaky about it. Will this result in an even bigger disaster when Danny finds out about her subterfuge? Obviously. But this is Mindy Lahiri we're dealing with. Even though she's a boss-ass bitch in all other areas of her life — the other main plotline of this episode involves her aiding in the birth of her new fertility practice's first successful pregnancy — she loses all sense of agency when it comes to telling Danny what's going on in her head. Mindy gets Jody (Garret Dillahunt) to prescribe her birth control pills (you bet your bottom dollar Danny is going to find those later in the episode). Right in time, too, because Danny has been tracking her menstrual cycle, and he knows that she's ovulating. He takes her on a romantic hansom cab ride through Central Park that results in them both feeling rather amorous, and wouldn't you know it, Danny doesn't have a condom on hand. It's actually Morgan (Ike Barinholtz) who talks a bit of sense into Danny. He helps Danny realize that if a couple makes a decision at one point in their relationship, that decision isn't set in stone. Mindy may have previously agreed to stay home with Leo, but she's changed her mind since then. Danny is still having trouble being nimble and willing to adapt. "I just don't know when the things we wanted became so different," he tells Morgan. "If she's important enough to you, maybe it's time for you to want something else," Morgan responds, in a rare moment of insight. This new perspective completely goes out of the window when Danny discovers Mindy's birth control pills. He confronts her at a screening of When Harry Met Sally, a film Mindy adores and Danny abhors, but he made an exception to see it in case an ovulating Mindy got in the mood. They get thrown out of the theater and continue their fight at home. It's the all-out, no-holds-barred confrontation we've been waiting for all season long.
"Every time you disagree with something that I do, it's a referendum on my character. If I want to go to work, it means I'm a bad mother. If I want to have a second glass of wine, it means I'm out of control. In your eyes, everything single thing I do is more evidence that I'm a bad person. I thought I made good decisions, and now you're just making all the decisions for me," a frustrated Mindy says. Danny argues that he's helping her make the right decisions, and that she's an amazing mom. Mindy counters, "I'm also a good doctor. I don't want to have to give up anymore to have more kids." Danny calls this selfish, which triggers another outburst from Mindy, who reminds him that he took off to California to care for his father, leaving her with Leo, when he could have hired a nurse or asked his younger brother to help. "Whenever you decide to do something, it's selfless. And whenever I decide to do something, it's selfish. You get to choose all the definitions. You are the judge [and] the jury," Mindy tells Danny. His response? To call her flighty and indecisive, and say she doesn't think through consequences. "I just wish you didn't have a list of my flaws at the tip of your tongue," Mindy says, as tears stream down her face. Just then, Mindy's phone vibrates. Her patient has gone into labor. She puts a pin in the argument and goes to the hospital to successfully deliver her fertility practice's first baby and celebrate with Morgan and Jody. Later, it's a triumphant but hesitant Mindy, who returns home to Danny. He immediately tells her that he wants to put their wedding plans on hold to think things through. Mindy agrees. We all agree. Let's stop this thing before anyone gets hurt more than they already have.