Kourtney Kardashian Desperately Wants Out Of The Kardashian-verse

Photo: Taylor Hill/FilmMagic..
Season 15 of Keeping Up with the Kardashians, which premiered last night, is Kourtney Kardashian's magnum opus. This is her chance to show the world why, exactly, she's the Kardashian who's not-quite-Kardashian, and she's using Twitter to do it. In the premiere, she and her sisters bicker over the Kardashian Khristmas Kard — the jeans-and-tee-shirt kard that had fans scrambling to look for a glimpse of a pregnant Kylie Jenner. (Jenner never appeared in the kard!)
When Kim struggles to get Kourtney to acquiesce to her photo shoot demands — they have to have a...meeting about the photoshoot — a spat erupts, leaving Kourtney in tears. This is also when Kim calls Kourtney "the least exciting [sister] to look at."
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During the premier, Kourtney and her sisters live tweeted the episode. On Twitter, things got even more vicious, although they ultimately insisted the family remains "ride or die." A lot of tweeting and re-tweeting happened along the way, so I've tried to condense the conversation as much as I can.
Kourtney v. Khloé
Khloé, responding to a Twitter question asking, "Whose side are you on?": "I just wanted peace."
Kourtney: "Khloe let’s be honest here."
Khloé: "What the fuck does that mean?? I didn’t want peace??"
Kourtney: "Eventually."
Khloé: "Please explain when I ever jumped in on that situation. I’m the one who fucking called you to make sure you were good."
Random Twitter user: "Y'all can't text?"
Khloé: "She started it on Twitter so hey."
Kourtney: "Sometimes you gotta take it to Twitter."
Kourtney v. Kim
Kourtney, defending herself to the Twitter void: "We all have our own priorities. Mine is being a mother."
Kim, replying to Kourtney: "And mine is not? The shoot was with our kids!!!!! My #1 priority is being a mother as well and I can work too, so can you!"
Kourtney: "And i do. But i wasn’t wanting MORE work, i already felt spread thin. Being a good mother also has different meaning to each of us. You’re an amazing mother, I’m not taking that away from you."
Kourtney, replying to a fan: "We’re ride or die. But i don’t accept the way we criticize and judge each other anymore. My personal growth doesn’t allow it."
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Kim, to Kourtney: "Good to have learned these boundaries this season. Lots of personal growth!"
And then, finally, Kim made the decision to call a conference.
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