Divorce Episode 7 Recap: The Blame Game

Robert kicks off this week's episode on the prowl, trying to get his groove back now that he's single again. He starts by having lunch with Kathy — you remember Kathy, the woman he admitted to Frances he almost slept with back on 9/11? Kathy is far from interested, however — in fact, she calls him a "tremendous asshole" for even trying it while he's going through a divorce. I don't blame her. In true Robert fashion, he doesn't stop there. He even hits on his regular Starbucks barista — and then gets upset when he learns she's engaged, accusing her of leading him on. "The big smiles and giggles, the hi Roberts, the extra shots, the time that you obviously bent over to pick up a dime that you had dropped for my benefit," he yells. "Where was your fancy boyfriend then?" Whoa there, Robert. Let's take a deep breath. Meanwhile, Frances is meeting with her lawyer, who drops a bombshell on her: Robert's company is worth nothing, and he's actually left them both in debt. In fact, he's been hiding some secrets of his own: Over the years he's taken out several loans and re-mortgaged their house. But her lawyer advises her to calm down and try to keep a cool head, because it's usually when things get emotional that mistakes are made. Frances, of course, does not heed this advice. In fact, she does the exact opposite of keeping a cool head: She throws a brick through the window of one of the houses Robert is flipping. Oh, snap. Things just got very Waiting To Exhale. Robert is still on the hunt for new women to date and is at a department store when he runs into Frances's friend Dallas, who delivers one of my favorite jokes of the season: "What are you doing here? Did John Deere start a line of denim suits?" Ha! But per usual, Robert turns some good-natured ribbing into a below-the-belt comment, insinuating that Dallas is a helicopter mom who's going to drive her kid away and end up alone. When he sees that what he said actually hurt her, he apologizes. "I'm sorry, Dallas. I didn't mean any of that. I'm just fucking lonely." Finally, Robert admits the real reason behind all his pettiness. Over at Frances's art gallery, which she's still working on fixing up, Diane reveals Robert's latest business plan to open a "fun house." This is the last straw for Frances: She confronts Robert about all the financial moves he's made by her back, which leads to much back-and-forth about who's money paid for what. Things get heated when their daughter Lila calls them over...to tell them to come sing happy birthday to their son, Tom. Yet again, they let their marital issues distract them from the kids. Next we see how completely opposite each party's lawyer is: Robert's lawyer Tony is doing a little more than advising him on his divorce (he suggests that he, slay some — um...well, if Trump can say it I can — pussy), while Frances's lawyer Max is acting pretty darn weird. Like, writing with the pen cap still on and forgetting people's names. Eventually he reveals that he's just had a mini stroke. Wuh-oh. His symptoms are in full-force during their first meeting with Robert and his lawyer, who claim there's some paper work they requested that is missing. Afterward, Max assures a worried Frances that he was only playing up his forgetfulness to get them more time to do some digging on Robert's matters. It was all strategic! We almost believe him — until Max opens a closet door when trying to get out of the building. At the end of the episode, Robert is still trying to get back in the game when a single mom named Janice at the kids' school says hi. Next thing you know they've just had sex at her house and she's offering him the pizza in her fridge. Of course, he decides to tell Frances (which is totally unnecessary). But he's less worried about telling Frances to hurt her and more in disbelief that he's just had sex with someone else that wasn't his wife for the first time in years. "How could you do that 34 times with him and then come home to me?" he asks Frances. "I never saw one sign of it. I was never suspicious of you." Frances replies: "And I was never suspicious of you." Ouch. There's been irreparable damage and betrayals on both sides of this marriage — not just sexually — and as Frances said earlier in the episode, she's done with feeling guilty.