UPDATE: As it turns out, we had every right to be terrified of Burger King's stateside Halloween Burger. People who have eaten the latest menu addition are complaining of a rather unfortunate side effect after consuming the burger — it's turning their poop green. We're not sure why people are sharing their private gastrointestinal information on the internet, but BuzzFeed rounded up some of the overshares and we have to admit they're pretty amazing. Here's to hoping this unfortunate result isn't just a purposeful part of the spooky Halloween Burger experience.
This story was originally published on September 21, 2015.
Hamburgers are one of those sacred foods that, in our humble opinion, should not be adulterated. (Just like people freaked out over peas in their guac, we can't deal when this America classic comes with 500 toppings that don't seem to belong.) Sure, a good fried egg or some well-placed jalapeños never hurt anyone, but the latest hamburger offering from Burger King is actually frightening. You've probably heard of Burger King's black burger, which originally launched in Japan (not to be confused with their red burger, of course.) It featured black buns and cheese, both dyed with bamboo charcoal, topped with squid ink sauce. Now, according to Business Insider, a Reddit user who claims to work at Burger King has alleged that the black burgers will make their stateside debut. Though the U.S. version of the sandwich won't feature black cheese or squid ink sauce, it will have those same alarming buns. Even with the new menu item apparently rolling out for Halloween in late October, we just can't get past the fact that they look completely inedible. Plus, there's this less-than-rave review from a Gawker writer who flew to Japan to try the monstrosity: "Final verdict: It's a burger, but grosser." Here's a thought: Maybe we should all focus on getting the veggies we need instead of importing foods that we are legitimately afraid of.