Talking about sex isn't easy — especially talking about your personal sex life. So when Refinery29 sat down with nine different couples, ranging in age from 13 to 90, to talk about sex, many of them were understandably a little nervous. In the video below from How Two Love, a series that explores modern day romance, you'll see a lot of giggling from teenagers who haven't even had sex yet, and some sweating from adults who've been married for a while.
While pretty much every couple went through at least one face-palm moment (and a couple of "oh man, I hope my mom doesn't see this" moments), it's important to hear real-life couples talk about how sex lives can change over the course of a relationship. Talking to other people about sex "can be a helpful way to reduce your anxiety and get validation about your experiences," Sheila Addison, PhD, LMFT, a sex-positive couples' therapist previously told Refinery29.
From this video, for example, we learn that there's no real "normal" for the amount of times a couple has sex every week. Answers from these couples range from "we haven't had sex in years" to four times a week (on a good week). We also learn that not everyone is having super adventurous sex (and some are), so there's no need to worry about spicing up your sex life if you're perfectly happy with how things are now.
Overall, the stories that these couples tell normalise sex. They show us that sex isn't perfect, but it doesn't have to be. And that's powerful.
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