8 Cautionary Tales Of New Year’s Eves Gone Hilariously Wrong

Photographed by Nicholas Bloise.
NYE is a controversial night, to say the least. Some people hate it, some people love it, but for most of us, it's a time to begrudgingly say goodbye to one tumultuous year and welcome in the next. If you have big January plans to be a better person next year; the type of person who meal preps or "exercises", it's often a final blowout; the last chance to really let loose. Maybe you imagine yourself throwing back the shots long past midnight with your eye makeup somehow still pristine, throwing back your head with laughter, your lovely party dress remarkably still not stained with wine. You're imagining yourself in a party montage from a 2010s romcom and you are absolutely loving it.
But it doesn't end up like that, does it? More likely, your night ends up with you stumbling into a second Uber at 4am (you accidentally cancelled the first), lipstick smudged around your mouth but not on it, clutching a crumpled McDonald's bag full of cold, sad fries. Or, you end up home, sober by 1am, and pissed off at your mate who cut your night short by vomiting in the cab at 11.45pm. In short: NYE is never good.
To help you bypass that mess (or feel better about years gone by) we've gathered peoples' stories from past New Year's and what they learned from it. The main moral of the story? Always plan ahead.

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