Remember that one time when your parents sat you down to have the tough, but necessary conversation about how the tiny, sparkly fairy you'd imagine coming into your room and exchanging the tooth under your pillow for cold, hard cash doesn't actually exist? Well, it turns out that they were wrong. The tooth fairy is real — his name is Barry, and he's fed up with the quality of some of the teeth he picks up.
We know this because Barry (full name, Barry T. Tooth Fairy) left a letter for a young boy in the UK who hasn't been very thorough while brushing his teeth. The boy, Sam Warren, showed the letter to his father, Henry Warren, who then posted it to Twitter.
"Our son is dreadful at brushing his teeth. Turns out the tooth fairy has had enough," he wrote.
Barry T. Tooth Fairy told Sam that he hadn't yet received payment for a recently lost tooth because it had to be taken in for review. Under further inspection, he wrote, "more than trace amounts of Fanta™, and residual amounts of both cereal and chocolate" were found.
The committee that reviewed his tooth has come to the conclusion that its poor condition is due to Sam's lack of care in brushing his teeth. "We recommend you review your practice here as a matter of urgency," Barry T. Tooth Fairy wrote. If he fails to do so, Tooth Fairy will have to revoke payment for all future teeth.
We know this may seem like a clever prank from Sam's parents, but when we reached out to Henry Warren he assured us this is not the case. It really was Barry T. Tooth Fairy who sent the letter. And it was a good strategy, because both Sam and his sister have learned to take better care of their teeth.
"Sam's reaction was somewhat chastened, as was his 5-year-old sister Lexie, to whom he also read the letter," Warren told Refinery29. "One is never too young to learn about the importance of good dental hygiene and the power of petty bureaucracy. It's what drives Britain."
Sam and Lexie are both now brushing religiously, Warren says, and their parents are "now thinking about how they can get them to eat more vegetables..."
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