All The Signs LuAnn De Lesseps' Marriage Was On The Rocks At The RHONY Reunion

Photo: Charles Sykes/Bravo.
When LuAnn (de Lesseps) D’Agostino first confirmed she had filed for divorce from her husband of mere months, Tom D’Agostino, the entire Real Housewives Of New York-watching community had one reaction, other than a collective “Told you so”: “Why couldn’t she have done this before they filmed the season 9 reunion?” The Bravo post-season get togethers are infamous for rehashing old tensions from recent episodes, as well as delving into new, weird drama. For instance, during last year’s RHONY season 8 reunion, Ramona Singer all but confirmed she had more dirt on LuAnn’s then-fiancé Tom, but wouldn’t share it because the Countess didn’t really want to hear it.
The minds over at Bravo realized fans would hope to hear some details on LuAnn’s long-expected breakup… and confirmed we wouldn’t get a single drop of information. Before viewers saw the New York cast of characters or their ringleader Andy Cohen for the season 9 reunion, a card flashed on the screen, reading “What you are about to watch was recorded three weeks before LuAnn filed for divorce from her husband of seven months, Tom.” It was the network’s way of saying, “Don’t even think about getting any hot gossip tonight.”
Still, the RHONY cast, including LuAnn, did watch last week’s finale, “Thank You And Good Night,” prior to filming the reunion. That means the Countess did catch Tom’s deeply suspicious behavior at Tinsley Mortimer’s party, including the moment he removed his mic to speak with ex-girlfriend Missy. Because of this, there were tons of signs throughout the finale that all was not well in D’Agostino Land, as it was taped mere weeks before the divorce announcement. Here are all the red flags hiding throughout the special.
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The “Right Now” Comment

When most people enter a marriage, LuAnn included, they expect this whole spouse-thing will be a forever commitment. Bizarrely, when Andy Cohen asks LuAnn how she feels without her Countess title, she responds, “Right now I love being Mrs. D’Agostino.” Everyone makes the same face.

Dorina jokes, “Right now? I hope forever,” while Ramona screeches, “Freudian slip!” At least everyone allows LuAnn to back peddle her statement, as she says, “I don’t miss my title. I like being LuAnn D’Agostino now. Mrs. D’Agostino.”

No one says anything to counter LuAnn.
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LuAnn Never Finishing A Pretty Important Sentence

Throughout RHONY season 9, multiple cast members questioned whether LuAnn’s wedding really was the best of ideas. But, at one point, even non-Bravolebrities dragged the controversial wedding, as Lu’s friend Barbara called out the future Mrs. D’Agostino for refusing to call off the wedding.

At the reunion, everyone defended Barbara’s shady comments, saying they were out of concern. LuAnn repeatedly tries to say “You don’t have to be concerned,” yet, she tellingly never finishes the sentence, cutting herself off at “You don’t have to be.”
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“What Is This Obsession With Tom?!”

After Ramona drops that aforementioned dirt she was holding during last year’s reunion — Tom supposedly went upstairs to a hotel room with a woman from Philadelphia, told her he had an “open relationship,” and then “nothing happened” — Andy asks the RHONY ladies if they’ve “heard anything” about Mr. D’Agostino since the wedding. Before anyone can respond, LuAnn yells, “What is this obsession with Tom?!” She’s clearly cutting people off before more rumored dirty laundry can spill out on national TV.

Still, the entire cast nods along with Bethenny Frankel’s explanation that they essentially believe LuAnn and Tom “have an arrangement,” and they’re trying to respect whatever the parameters of that “particular dynamic” might be. Bethenny then confirms she also heard the allegations Ramona brought up involving “a girl in L.A.” LuAnn originally dismissed that story since a loose cannon like Ramona was the one saying it, but, now Bethenny is bringing it up too.
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LuAnn’s Ex-Husband Reveal

When LuAnn claims she would leave Tom if he cheats on her, the cast proves they don’t exactly believe their friend. Sonja Morgan actually vocalizes why she doesn’t agree with LuAnn, saying the ex-Countess didn’t leave her first husband Alex De Lesseps, and “he wasn’t faithful.”

LuAnn counters Sonja’s comment by explaining, “We were separated and I didn’t really want anyone to know.” So, here is the proof LuAnn prefers to keep a stiff upper lip amid serious relationship problems.
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“Why Do You Think I Stayed At The Hotel Last Night?”

Finally, Andy brings up Tom’s dubious behavior at Tinsley’s “Thank You Sonja” party, where he flirted with ex Missy and took off his own mic to tell a story about the last time he saw his former lover.

First of all, LuAnn says she didn’t ask Tom about the incident, despite the fact she had seen it the evening prior, meaning she very easily could have inquired about it in the hours following. Andy points this out and LuAnn keeps saying she “didn’t have a chance.” LuAnn attempts to laugh off her husband’s flirtatious shenanigans, but Bethenny tells her longtime frenemy she has a “Countess Shield” protecting her from truly reacting to anything. On Twitter, LuAnn last night confirmed, “The shield is called self-preservation.”

As Bethenny continues to explain she would be “crying in the bathroom” if her partner behaved like Tom, LuAnn finally shoots back, “Well, why do you think I stayed at the hotel last night?” As everyone’s reactions prove, no one knew that happened.
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LuAnn Prioritizing Appearances Over Feelings

As LuAnn tries to explain away Tom’s suspect actions, she admits she tries to “look like the tough guy.” Instead of continuing on that thread of appearances versus inner emotions, LuAnn attempts to explain away Tom’s behavior, saying she’s going to talk to him “about how [his “humor”] might come off.” Everyone immediately starts yelling that the problem isn’t how Tom “comes off,” the problem is how he’s disrespecting his wife.
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The Relationship Between LuAnn’s Son And Tom

LuAnn reveals her college-aged son Noel had a “hard” time accepting Tom’s place in his mother’s life due to the rumors constantly swirling around Tom. The mom of two swears the two most important men in her life “do”have a relationship now,” but adds, “You know, they’re not super close…”
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LuAnn’s “Bachelor” Defense

The Countess accidentally boards the Defend Tom At All Costs Train, first pretending not to know what “indiscretions” might mean, and then making up excuse after excuse for her husband’s rumor mill-stirring actions.

“It’s either I accept him for the way he is,” she begins, but then doesn’t add a second option. “I’m not going to change him at this point.” LuAnn says she has “suggested” Tom stop behaving in a way that directly disrespects their marriage, adding, “Listen, he’s a grown man … who’s lived his entire life a certain way: as a Bachelor. He has friends. I’m friends with Jacques!”

Everyone reminds LuAnn she doesn’t “make out with Jacques,” as Tom supposedly did last year with a woman he had lunch with recently. LuAnn finally relents, saying, “Of course not.”
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