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These Sex Positions Will Prove To You That Bigger Isn’t Necessarily Better

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    Photographed by Natalia Mantini.

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    When it comes to penises, we’re often told that bigger is better — but in reality, that's far from the truth. In fact, studies suggest that, other than than a boost in confidence, larger penises don't afford the men who have them with any extra prowess in the bedroom.

    And confidence? Well, that can be learned.

    The truth is, no matter what someone’s penis size, creativity and a willingness to experiment can be key. But there are some positions and techniques that are specially suited for various sizes of penises (even the Kama Sutra touts this).

    So for those of you who have sex with people who have penises, we consulted four experts on the art and science of pleasure: Dr. Zhana Vrangalova, head researcher and professor of human sexuality at New York University; Kenneth Play, a sex educator based in Brooklyn who leads workshops on kink and pleasure; Amy Levine, sex coach and founder of Ignite Your Pleasure; and Alfred Kendrick, a personal trainer who specializes in workouts that improve your sex life. They’ve helped us create a handy guide of sex positions and tricks that will finally lay the “small” penis stereotype to rest.

    Forget your preconceived notions of penis size and read on for the positions, tools, and moves you may want to try with a male partner — not despite his small penis, but because of it. (And hey, these can totally be tried with a trusty strap-on, too!)


    The gap between what we learned in sex ed and what we're learning through sexual experience is big — way too big. So we're helping to connect those dots by talking about the realities of sex, from how it's done to how to make sure it's consensual, safe, healthy, and pleasurable all at once. Check out more, here.


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    Pile Driver

    This one requires some flexibility and might work better on a carpeted floor. Lay on your back. Then, swing your legs back and over your head to get your feet close to the ground. Your partner can help by lifting your butt up and over. (If you practice yoga, this is the one called "plow pose.") Then, your partner squats on top of you and enters you from above.

    "If the guy can get positioned over [his partner], he doesn’t have to do that much work, just hold himself up," Kendrick says. Bonus points if you spread your legs — that’s called the Spread Eagle.

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    It’s easy to think flexibility is just a novelty factor for sex, but it can be a game-changer, especially when it comes to deepening penetration. For guys who are worried about their penis size, improving flexibility in the hips is key.

    "Guys are typically more stiff and they don’t have a great deal of coordination in the hip region, but the ability to move and manipulate hips is actually the ability to move and manipulate your penis," Kendrick says. "The more a guy can press his hips forward, the deeper he can penetrate."

    To improve flexibility, guys can try a couple of basic yoga stretches: upward facing dog and frog pose, the ultimate hip opener.

    "Any position where he’s straddling [his partner] will benefit from that," Kendrick says.

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    Splitting Bamboo

    Want to really get the legs out of the way? Lay down on your back with one leg draped over your partner’s shoulder or around his waist, while he straddles the other leg and enters you. It’s full-on contact, with your legs out of the way so he can get all the way inside. Plus, you have access to your clit to add a little something extra for yourself with your hands.

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    An unforgettable sexual experience often involves more than just penetration, especially since it’s actually the norm to need more than just a penis to get off. A 2006 study, for example, found that only 30% of the 1,335 women surveyed regularly reached orgasm with penetration alone.

    "We are a very penetration-centric culture — we think penetration is the end-all, be-all of sex, but it isn’t," says Dr. Zhana. "Many women say it feels better, it contributes to their orgasm, but there’s [often] more that needs to happen."

    According to Play, most people think friction alone causes the type of intense pleasure that gathers into an orgasm, but it’s actually the pressure (like a massage) that takes it to the next level — and fingers are great for that, Play says.

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    Flexed Doggy Style

    Start with doggy style, where you are on your hands and knees and your partner is kneeling behind you. Then, drop your chest and head to the bed and tilt your butt up in the air — the more you curve your back, the better. Then, your partner moves his knees a couple inches back so he can tilt his pelvis forward.

    "In that position, the guy is able to push his hips forwards enough to penetrate [his partner]," Kendrick says.